church

Tuesday Night (Pictures)

The Grove! YAY. It was good. It’s Ocktoberfest. They had brats and rootbeer. Yucky to the brats and sauerkraut. YAY to the rootbeer. I’m not a fan but it helped when I was thirsty.

Even better was that I got to spend a LOT of time with my new buddy Jon C. He is out of control, that one. Loads of fun. After the Grove, he and I hung out and talked for a long time. Other people popped in and out as well. Mike B. headed over with his second (?) brat. HA. HA. Check this out:


Think he liked it?

It was especially funny when THIS happened:


SPLAT! Right on the new carpet!!!

He shouldn’t feel bad. Kim’s entire brat went SPLAT to the floor!! Besides, he cleaned it up so well that it warranted a comment from Jon C: You cleaned that up like a girl!

Later, a group of us went to Applebee’s where EVERYONE was out of control. It was interesting, being the only girl in a group of guys when almost ALL of them are fairly good-looking. I ate wings and fries and shared them with Jon R and Jon C. They played great ’90s music. Here is Jon rockin’ it out to Guns N Roses:


Adorable, isn’t he? NO boy should have eyelashes that long. Unless he’s Aidan. ;)

There were a few downer spots, the biggest being that I LOST MY WALLET. :( I didn’t realize it ’til I went to pay at Applebee’s. (Thank GOD Rob covered for me). This is bad. Firstly, it’s a SWEET Mickey Mouse Club wallet, but secondly, everything is in there. Cards, money, license, insurance, gift cards… I’m PRAYING it’s in the church–but the last time I remember seeing it was at the gas station. However, my debit card isn’t in my car, so I know I had the wallet when I left the gas station. I think it fell out of my bag while I was rifling through it for a pen before service started. I am going to go during my lunch break and try to find it. :(

I should sleep. I have a longish meeting filled (GRUMBLE) day tomorrow, and I’m working for two; covering for someone who is out of the office until Monday. AND it’s already nearly one. I still need to get a shower. ACK. Time flies when one is having fun, yes?

*sigh*

Later…

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Science + Beer = GOOD! (Pictures)

I’m sorry, but this is bloody hot:

I had two good nights with two good guys this week. Monday, I hung out with Rob all evening. We ate dinner at Max & Erma’s (he bought!), and we watched Wedding Crashers. It was a good time. Rachel McAdams looked COMPLETELY different from when she was in Mean Girls. I honestly did not recognize her. I liked the dark hair on her. She was very pretty. I enjoyed the movie, and the company too, of course.

Last night was The Grove. But before that, I hung out at Abbie’s place. She made me dinner (yummy Van De Kamps fish!), and from there, we went to drama rehearsal at the church. Then I went to copy the Bark. I got 50 made before I was summoned to help out the multi-media folk. Of course, the projector wasn’t acting right, so we got to fuss around with that. Christie M. figured out the problem at EXACTLY 7:30pm. Jon C played Fix You and sounded darn sweet doing it. After The Grove, a bunch of us went to The Claddagh Irish Pub for drinks and chillin’. Jon C and I shared chicken tenders, fries, and salad. He bought too. :) It was yummy. I drank an amaretto sour. Mmmmmm. TOTALLY hit the spot. I enjoyed the time with those folks and with Jon C too. :)


Jon C & Me

Today was work. I was tired and anxious to get home because I had to get started on my packing! So the clothes are just about done. I just need to pack essentials that are still in use (hair brush, toothbrush, deodorant, etc.) and the other stuff like a book or two, my journal, pens, my camera, laptop, things like that. I’ll do that tomorrow. There is so much to do still. I need to get gas. I have to get stuff to Lauren so she can take it down to New Orleans. Plus I have blocking rehearsal. ACK. Tomorrow will be crazy. But Friday this time, I’ll be in CALIFORNIA with Amy (nerdiness)!!! WOO! I am excited and can’t wait to relax. But first, I get to endure hours on two airplanes. Oh well, it’ll be worth it. Plus, it’ll be my first solo flight ever. I’m just a little nervous, but I have a feeling I’m going to be catching some Zs at some point, reading like crazy, and listening to my iPod. (mental note–pack iPod charger)

I’ll try to update tomorrow, and maybe Friday morning before I leave for the airport (mental note #2–call mother-in-law to confirm pickup/drop-off times). Of course, I will also try to update when I am there. We’ll see how that goes, though. :)

ONLY TWO MORE DAYS (or something) ‘TIL CALIFORNIA!!!

Most bizarre line from a book ever:
“You must fornicate in public or forfeit.” – The Bartered Bride by Mary Jo Putney

HUH????

‘Til later…

P.S. Thanks to those of you who answered my poll and commented. For now, I’m going to put the entire project on hold and decide what to do a bit later. :)

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I was reading about Hell…

Every few months or so, I kind of go into this deep meditation or research kick and read about Hell. The existence of it. And I sit here, wondering why I worship my God. Do I worship Him because I love Him, because I love His Son? Or do I do it because I’m afraid of going to Hell?

Bear with me as I muddle through this. I need to get this out and my thoughts are kind of all over the place.

Hell is a horrible place, from what I’ve heard/read. Being tortured by fire at extremely high temperatures. Molten sulpher. Worms that eat you. Other countless horrors. And the part that disturbs me is that it lasts forever. It never, ever, ever, ever stops. NEVER. I can’t grasp that and yet, it sounds sooo scary to me. I’m terrified of going there. Even as I sin because I can’t help it. I’m a human, I’m a sinner. That’s that. And Hell is a scary reality for me. As far as I’m concerned, it exists, and I hate it.

I don’t want to be a “Christian” who’s following this faith only to avoid going to Hell. But I find myself doing that. I start to analyse my every move, making sure I don’t do something to offend God. But then I hear that Jesus died for me so that I wouldn’t go to Hell. Okay, that’s wonderful.

But what about those who have never heard of Jesus? Why should they be punished for eternity for something that is not of their fault? God can do anything–why wouldn’t He provide them the Gospel? Will us Christians who are supposed to evangelize end up going to Hell because we didn’t go out and try to teach all of those people the gospel? How does this work?

Why is there a Hell? I tend to think of my God relationship as a parent-child/teenager relationship. And when I relate myself with Aidan, I can’t see myself ever, ever, ever punishing him forever and ever for anything! I love him too much. I love him more than anything; the mere thought of anything terrible happening to him brings me near tears. So how can God, who loves us so, want to punish us for eternity?

Okay, okay. So that’s where Jesus comes in. Apparently God doesn’t want to punish us for eternity. He sent His son to die for us so we would be able to go to Heaven. But that still doesn’t help me reconcile the idea that there are lots of people who never even get the CHANCE to learn about Jesus and therefore they get to suffer for eternity. Who is the blame for that? Will *I* go to Hell because I’m not evangelizing? Because I’m not in other countries teaching/preaching the Gospel? It is SO hard to lead someone to Christ. I’ve tried. I can’t do it. It’s not my talent. Will I go to Hell because I am unskilled in that area of my life??

Does God offer them an opportunity after they die? Who knows? Should I even be caring/fretting?

So then I start to think–if I’m going to Hell anyway, then why am I trying to be so good? Why don’t I just do whatever I want? I should just go to Best Buy now and take that plasma HDTV I want. I can think of lots of things I want to do, but I don’t because I don’t want to offend God and therefore go to Hell.

It all boils down to Hell for me. I’ve always been afraid of being punished. Even when I was little, my mother said that a “whipping” was the one thing I was terrified of. Is it healthy to lead my life with that kind of a fear? What happened to my desire to have a relationship with God? And with Jesus? Where did that go?

Is Hell real? Or is it an idea planted to scare us all into behaving? Will we understand at the Final Judgement? Will we all see our lives and our actions and understand and accept why we deserve Hell for eternity and go there willingly? Is there even going to be a Final Judgement? I don’t know about you, but the thought of all of my sins/thoughts/actions/everything being exposed to the world scares me to pieces. And fills me with great shame.

I don’t know, I don’t know.

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