Weekends are way too short. Now that I’m working outside of the home again, with an hour commute each way, my free time has become very limited. After working from home for three years, I’m still adjusting, even after four months, to the sheer amount of resources dedicated to having a full time job in an office again.

There is the financial cost. Now I have to pay for a monthly commuter pass, when before I paid as I went. Since I didn’t use the train or buses more than once or twice a week at most… well, that’s an increase.

I try not to buy lunches out, as that can add up. $10 a day, $50 a week, $200 a month? No thanks! I take my lunch in most of the time, and I’ll buy lunch only as a treat from time to time.

New clothes (we can only wear jeans on Friday), new expensive headphones (I work in a busy area, and that’s no good when you’re an introverted proofreader), new shoes, because boots are not comfy all day, and my others were either athletic shoes or falling apart.

Energetically, I’m exhausted every day when I come home. Constant people people people. I like my co-workers. But I wish, all the time, for a quiet office where I can work in the dark.

But the hardest cost is the time cost. Eight or more hours, five days a week where my time is not my own. Two hours of commuting back and forth. The prep time every morning and every evening…. that’s another 2–3 hours. If I have freelance work to do, or stuff for my book, or other assorted administrative things to do., plus dinner…well, that’s my entire day.

My personal to do lists are towering. My apartment and bedroom is a mess. I haven’t unpacked from Disney World. Because when the weekend rolls around, I’m exhausted. I crash the whole time.

I have plans and lists. Clean. Organize. Exercise. Sims! Read ALL the things. Shop (I need new ear plugs, gloves, boots, work pants). Write!

But instead. Instead.

I sleep. I play games on my iPad. I read. Sunday night comes way too quickly. And I spend the weekend desperate for Friday night, so the next weekend, I can maybe do better.

I never do better.

I have to figure out how to do better.

Because I do like the work I do. And I do like the office; it’s very pretty. As I said, I like my co-workers. And I LOVE having a steady income. I’m in debt again, and I like supported my artist friends. I like buying books and makeup and traveling.

I just have to figure out… how to balance things better.

But in the meantime…

Rest. It’s time to start a new week.

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