Month: February 2007

…

/ ronni, sad

I don’t like myself very much today.

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I WAS Falling Asleep, But…

/ grrr!, life

The first one or two times one hears the neighbors going at it are funny. The next few times are annoying. Now it’s just getting OLD. I’m going to tell the rental office to tell them that I can hear EVERYTHING that goes on in their bedroom and if they don’t want to be embarrassed, they need to quiet down.

Granted, I hate to squelch people when they’re making love. But they have to realize that they don’t live in a house, they live in a complex with other people and therefore need to be respectful. I’m just glad Aidan was asleep. Any time he hears a strange sound, he asks “What was that noise?” It’s only a matter of time before he hears them and asks what those noises are.

And I wouldn’t be so annoyed by it if they didn’t WAKE ME UP with their sounds of passion. I sleep with a volcano on and a noise machine, and I can hear them over that.

So now, they’re sleeping in their post-coital bliss, and I am wide awake on a Sunday night.

THAT is maddening.

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Potluck Like Whoa! :) (Video)

/ aidan, books, life, videos

First of all, you can send me Virtual Valentines using this nifty little guy:

My Valentinr - lilrongal
Get your own valentinr

I won’t see anything until Valentine’s Day, but I will know how many I’ve received. Neat, huh?

Second of all, it’s SATURDAY and Aidan slept until 10am. Unfortunately, he tends to wet the bed when he sleeps that late. Boo. “Don’t see it,” he commands, trying to cover the evidence. Sigh.

Last night, before we went to sleep, Aidan made a really loud fart sound with his mouth and yelled “MOMMY! YOU FARTED”! I’m sure the neighbors had a field day with that. For fifteen minutes, we made fart noises and yelled out “_____, YOU FARTED!” It was great.

I finally emptied my memory cards! One had 850 photos on it, the other had about 150 plus videos. Now they’re clean, and all the pictures and videos have been moved to CDs. YAY. I feel accomplished. Kind of. Plus, Time Warner came and got the old cable modem. All my bills are paid or accounted for, and I don’t have to go anywhere until Monday. I was getting collection calls, and I finally called the number back to see what the banana they were calling me for, and it turned out they were for the person who had the phone number before me. So now, I don’t get collection calls anymore. 🙂

I like having loose ends tied up.

Yesterday at work, we got called into an impromptu staff meeting at 1:30pm. There was no meeting–there was ice cream, cherries, chocolate sauce and other fixings so we could build our own sundaes! Plus, Cheryl & Co. delivered Valentine cookies. YAY for sweets! YAY for thwarting the 2:30pm slumps. Last Friday, there were two cakes and fruit. The cakes said “TGIF” on them.

Just now, Aidan was starting to get really fussy and kind of mean, and it finally dawned on me that the child needed lunch. Now he’s happily eating a chicken pot pie and watching Cars.

I got an email from an old college roommate whom I hadn’t heard from in YEARS. I also heard from one on MySpace not too long ago. It’s amazing when people come back, you know. Exciting, too.

It’s gonna get REALLY COLD here in a few days. Highs in the single digits. I’m getting the deep freeze I wanted, but it’s not fun while going through it. Looks like only a few days, though, so that’s good. Hopefully just enough to kill those mega-mosquitoes that were probably trying to breed when it was unseasonably warm last month.

I finished The Last Days by Scott Westerfeld yesterday during lunch. It was really good. A definite page-turner. I started on Sloth by Robin Wasserman, but I’m having a hard time getting into it. I also had a hard time with Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan. Just renewed the Playlist one, will try it again a bit later.

Hmmm. What else? Oh yeah. Here is a link to the list of books I’ve read in 2007. It’ll be updated every time I finish a new book, so check back there often: [2007 Books]

And finally, a video demonstrationg Aidan’s smarts again.

more Check it out!

See ya!

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A Dream Deferred

/ sad, writing

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore—
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over—
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

– Langston Hughes

Got an email from my agent. Only Yours has officially been rejected by every publisher. Every single one.
A year of submissions. A year of roller coaster emotions, wild hope, then hopelessness. Who wants to read about an REAL Christian girl with REAL struggles who may or may not make the right choices in the end? Certainly not the Christians. And certainly not the non-Christians. No audience. No sale. Another book, pushed, no SHOVED, maybe even kicked, under the proverbial bed.

On the one hand, I want to get back on that horse and show them. On the other hand, the odds against me seem almost insurmountable.

Right now I feel so many emotions. Sad, relieved, determined, tired. Nothing I can actually describe.

I’m sure the tears will come at 2am, when I’m wide awake, thinking of how much of a failure I am.

I know what you’re going to say. You’re not a failure. You’re going to make it. You have to keep trying. Keep believing. Keep focusing. JUST DO IT.

My dream is officially deferred.

Now what will become of it? Of me?

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