Well, just call me the journal collector, I suppose.

I’ve been sitting here and shaking my right leg for at least an hour now, I’ll bet. Yes. I am indeed antsy here.

So many things going on. Time is flying, but then again, it’s crawling. Autumn will be here soon. Before I even know it.

And I’m looking forward to it. I always do before the SAD kicks in. September is one of my favorite months. Pretty blue sky. Perfect weather. That little bite in the air. The leaves.

Today, I am wearing a fall-like outfit. Brown. Lots of brown. I just felt in the mood.

You know what’s beautiful? This:

I dare you to disagree.

I don’t know why I can’t seem to remember that eating only Doritos and chocolate for lunch is a bad idea. It really sounded okay at the time, but I am certainly paying for it now. Ugh.

I often wonder if I’ll be able to truly relax. There is so much on my mind right now. So many things to be anxious about, to worry about. It’s really silly, because some of the things that I get all flustered about, I can’t really DO anything about except be patient. So, while trying to be patient, I sit here and shake my right leg.

Here’s the problem. I spend too much time waiting for things, rather than living in the moment. I get to work around 8am, and I spend all morning waiting for lunch, then I wait all afternoon for the workday to end. Then I get into my car, and wait at traffic lights and stop signs to get home. All week, I wait for the weekend to get here.

At this moment, I’m waiting for:
– the end of the workday;
– the weekend;
– ANYTHING from my agent on the status of the book I sent him last month;
– my trip to Chicago;
– a bunch of other stuff I dare not mention here.

When something happens that requires me to be in the moment, it’s hard for me to do it. I actually have to FORCE myself to stop and stay present. Else I’ll drift. Either to the next thing, or into my dreamworld.

(Originally published at Anywhere Is…)