Stolen from Tami!

I AM: A Dreamer.
I WANT: To be normal.
I HAVE: Issues.

I WISH: That I would be content in God alone.
I HATE: My sin.
I FEAR: Never being happy again.
I HEAR: Too many lies.
I SEARCH: For God and His Truth.
I WONDER: What’s the point?
I REGRET: Too much.
I LOVE: Jesus.
I ALWAYS: Let fear get the best of me.
I DANCE: ALL THE TIME.
I SING: In my car. Please don’t put me on Motormouth.
I CRY: A lot
I WIN: Rarely.
I LOSE: Often.
I NEED: A Savior.
I SHOULD: Stop looking to others to save me.

…….

I KEEP A DIARY: Several. Online and offline.

I LIKE TO COOK: Spaghetti.

I HAVE A SECRET YOU HAVE NOT SHARED WITH ANYONE: It hadn’t been shared, but now it has been and I feel relieved that it has been.

I BELIEVE IN LOVE: Depends on the kind of love you’re talking about. ;)

THE SEXIEST PERSON I KNOW OF: ADAM BRODY. Or maybe not so much…. cause he’s adorable, but not really sexy. So I’m thinking Angelina Jolie.

THE CUTEST PERSON I KNOW OF: Aidan.

CLOSEST FRIEND: Jen*Jen, Ivy, Kelly P

THE PERSON THAT KNOWS THE MOST ABOUT ME: see above

THE LAST THOUGHT I WENT TO SLEEP WITH: Probably something I had no business thinking of….

INSIDE JOKE: “Where’s Todd?”

WANT TO GET MARRIED: I am married.

GET MOTION SICKNESS: If I sit in the backseat AND read.

GET ALONG WITH MY PARENTS: My mommy and stepdaddy.

LIKE THUNDERSTORMS: NO NO NO. :(

EYE COLOR: hazel

HAIR COLOR: golden

BIRTHPLACE: Cleveland, Ohio

FAVORITES

NUMBER: 19

COLOR: Pink.

Day: Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. And Tuesday evenings.

MONTH: June, September, December

Song: Anywhere Is – Enya

FOOD: Spaghetti

SEASON: Autumn.

……..

IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU…

CRIED? No. If you’d said the past 48 hours, then yes.

HELPED SOMEONE? No. If you’d said the past 48 hours, then yes!

BOUGHT SOMETHING? Yes.

SAID I LOVE YOU? Yes.

TALKED TO AN EX? No, but I got a wedding invitation from him on Saturday.

MISSED AN EX? Only as a friend. He was wacky.

WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? Always.

HAD A SERIOUS TALK? Hmmm… tack on another 8 hours and I can say yes.

MISSED SOMEONE? Yes.

HUGGED SOMEONE? Yes.

FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? No.

…….

5 BANDS I LISTEN TO:

1. Aerosmith

2. Pink Floyd

3. –

4. –

5. –

WEARING…

CLOTHES: khaki colored coudoroys from Gap, Gap sweater, Gap socks… um…

JEWLERY: wedding band, Mickey Mouse watch, Tiffany bracelet

HAIR: Down, bang held back by a clip.

MAKE UP: A little.

DEODERANT: Yes.

LAST…

THING YOU SAID: “Okay.”

THING YOU TYPED: ”

THING YOU ATE: One of those Halloween colored Kit Kats.

PERSON YOU TALKED TO: A guy asking if I had a Time Zone map.

PERSON YOU CALLED: another secretary.

………..

TEN THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:

1. Publish a novel.
2. Drive an Audi TT
3. Save some money.
4. Skydive.
5. Go to Paris.
6. Go to London.
7. Fly first class.
8. Ride a horse.
9. Take another dance class.
10. Get off my medication.

NINE THINGS I WANT TO EAT

1. Spaghetti
2. Cream of Wheat
3. Bacon
4. Prime Rib
5. Wellington chicken
6. Spinach
7. Dressing
8. Macaroni and Cheese
9. Greens

EIGHT PEOPLE I HAVEN’T SEEN IN FOREVER:

1. Charla
2. Ivy
3. Jason
4. –
5. –
6. –
7. –
8. –

SIX PEOPLE I WORK WITH:

1. Travis
2. Mark
3. Shawn
4. Susan (Snoozin)
5. Drema
6. Rick

FIVE MOVIES I OWN:

1. Clueless
2. Girls Just Want To Have Fun
3. Firestarter
4. Tomb Raider
5. Harry Potter

FOUR THINGS THAT MAKE ME LAUGH OUT LOUD:

1. Rob and Tyler together.
2. Aidan.
3. The Proud Family.
4. –

THREE 80s SONGS I COULD ROCK OUT TO:

1. Beat It – MJ
2. almost any Madonna song
3. Pour Some Sugar On Me – Def Leppard

TWO THINGS I TAKE EVERYWHERE:

1. My camera.
2. My iPod.

ONE PLACE I’D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW…

No comment. :D

I got my evaluation done at the chiropractor’s office today. She took more X-rays and asked me some questions, and I had to take a “quiz” that had some of the most absurd answers on it. Wednesday, I get to see if all the cracking and tractioning did anything.

Traffic was no fun this morning. Lots of cars going slowly along the highway. Boo.

Tonight, I get to hang out with Bizzy (otaku_witch)! I am so excited. I’m pretty much going there straight after work. Should be some good times.

I was all set to write a nice, long entry and I’ve just completely lost it.

Got this in email today:

Changing Your Mental Outlook

1. Look at how the different elements in your life interact: home/relationships/health/work. If your personal life isn’t in order, it’s harder to focus on your projects at work. Chaos in your personal life can be compounded by stress at work.

2. Infect yourself with positive thoughts and look for the opportunity or lesson in every challenge.

3. Develop a diverse support system at work. It’s fun and comfortable to be with people who are like you or you’ve known for a long time. However, it is equally important to develop strong relationships with people who aren’t just like you.

4. Don’t belittle your job or employer. Work provides you with a purpose, challenges you, puts food on your table, enables growth, and stimulates you in a variety of ways. Work should be seen in a positive light — even on Monday mornings!

This woman named Joan Burge is head of THE World Class Administrative Assistant program. She sends out these things every Monday called “Monday Motivators.” That’s where the above statements were taken from.

I love how easy these statements make things sound you know? Perhaps I am just a pessimistic or too sensitive. I’ve come into work with positive thoughts only to be shut down because a certain person is in a pissy mood and decides I’m to be the figurative whipping boy. How the heck is one supposed to handle that all the time? Walking on eggshells? I hate it, and yet, I can’t get out because I’m apparently not skilled enough for ANY JOB.

Grrrr.

Anyway. I’ll try to “choose my attitude” or whatever. Cooperate mumbo-jumbo just gets on my nerves sometimes. As does the “GAME” which I will never master because I’m not ruthless like that. Well, whatever.

I came in this morning with a decent attitude. I really did. Until I saw “make copies for me. find me a conference room.” I just want to pull my hair out because I have all these OTHER skills that are dying to be used, and I try to use them and they have no interest in that. NOBODY respects a secretary, and that’s unfortunately because that means breaking out of this role is virtually impossible.

I don’t want to be one of those “I’m too good for this job” snobs. Because a job puts food on the table. A job is meant for sustaining life. Just once, I’d like to wake up and look forward to the things I have to do, the people I work with. Instead of wondering what HE will be waiting to bitch at me about because apparently I can’t even do this job right, maybe I can come in and go back to getting the glowing reviews I used to back in the day.

It’s so hard going from overachiever to nonachiever. :( Once you fall, there’s no getting back up. Stuck. Bah.

I guess I did ramble after all.

Random Questions & Thoughts.

– I wonder why Shania Twain picks such weird titles for her songs.
– Why does it always have to be about someone else? Can it ever be about ME without resulting in my feeling guilty or selfish?
– What’s the point of praying when God’s going to do what He wants anyway?
– Why can’t I stand up for myself when people piss me the hell off?
– Credit cards are evil.

And that’s it for now, I think.

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