I wonder what I’ll be doing? How I’ll be feeling?
A Year From Tonight…
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my scramblings & ramblings
I wonder what I’ll be doing? How I’ll be feeling?
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I’m having a hard time today.
The last time I saw Adam was September 17th. I won’t see him again until the middle of November. That’s three weeks away.
October is always rough month, simply because he’s so busy with the Weird Chicago tours. He’s working every weekend, plenty of days, and week nights as well. Not only is October long by virtue of being a five-Monday month this year, (and having its normal 31 days), but not seeing your fiancé for so long is hard.
Thank GOD tomorrow is the last day.
It’s hard because I’ve gone so long without seeing him, and to think I have so much more longer to go… *sigh*
It’s hard not to get angry at TIME, as it creeps by during the work day/work week, and it crawls when I’m waiting to see Adam… and then when the weekend FINALLY gets here, the time speeds up and flashes by. The weekend, or week, or whatever, is gone in a flash, and it’s back to the waiting. Always with the waiting.
This won’t be the longest I’ve gone without seeing him. Earlier this year, I went from not seeing him from February 18th to May 2nd. That doesn’t make it any easier, though. And it makes planning for the wedding way more challenging than it already is.
The goodbyes are getting old. The tears in the airport. It’s getting harder and harder to tolerate them now, and there are still several months of this ahead. It’s hard not to get jealous of the couples who get to be together all the time. It’s hard not to be angry at circumstances, at life, at the restrictions which are keeping me here.
This long distance stuff…I am SO OVER it. 🙁
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Ugh. Today is DRAGGING. At 9:30 this morning, it felt like it should have been lunchtime.
The city smelled extra bad this morning. Periodically, the air will just… reek, like a toilet or something. Today was one of those days, and ick.
Work is uncomfortable today. I’m too warm, which RARELY happens, and all I’ve been doing all day is checking off vocabulary words. My mind is about to melt from the boredom. My pages are due tomorrow, I REALLY hope they come in. When I have something that’s challenging, the day goes much more quickly, and I feel like I’m contributing a lot more. As of now, I cannot check off another vocabulary list.
It’s a slow email day, a slow work day, a slow, slow day. But I bet that once the clock hits 4:15pm, the time will speeeeeed up. >:(
Word of Advice: Never start reading a really good book during lunch. The afternoon will take that much longer to pass.
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Today was a weird day.
When I got to work, I was making myself some tea and also getting some water for my water bottle. One of my co-workers came over and asked if I’d heard about our receptionist. Now, I knew our receptionist had been very sick. This morning, I found out she’d passed away.
I haven’t worked at Zaner-Bloser long, but Ann was always a sweetheart. I’m in denial, because I can’t believe I won’t hear her say “good-niiggght” to me as I’m leaving for the day, anymore. I mean, it just doesn’t seem real. 🙁 I’m still going to be checking her desk, wondering when she’s going to get better and come back to work.
After work, I went to the library and ran into one of my neighbors there. The nice one. He sits out back and he reads and smokes his cigar. We stood in the parking lot and talked for two hours. He is older, but funny as hell. He’s one of those naughty old men. 🙂
Although, he did give me three pounds of hamburger because he said he doesn’t want to cook it. So now I have a HUGE three-pound roll of hamburger meat that I will separate and use for spaghetti and chili and other assorted yummies.
I went to two costume parties this weekend. Had a blast-a-rooni. Friday night’s was at a clubhouse, and with a few friends I used to go to church with. Aidan was freaked out by the creepy decorations. But he looked very cute:
See?
Aidan was so cute! And this little girl came to the party and I sat there and watched him try to impress her and get all flirty and stuff. It almost make me cry, because it was like I was getting a sneak peek at teenager Aidan. Eeek!
Saturday night, Aidan and I hit my friend Heather’s housewarming/Halloween party. It was the best party ever. EVER. Seriously. There was so much food (she had me take some home, and I have enough for lunches all week, and a few dinners, too), and there was candy and all sorts of treats and toys and favors and fun fun fun. Again, best party EVER.
Again, Heather’s party was amazing. Her house is gorgeous, and I have NEVER seen so much food at a party before. Seriously. It was incredible. And Aidan had a BLAST, running around and playing and melting everyone’s heart. People kept coming up to me with tons of compliments about him. He’s adorable, he’s a sweetheart, he is well-behaved, he has great manners. Yay! He’s just such a great kid. ♥
On top of that, Heather’s house has this amazing energy about it. I can’t describe it, but I felt so relaxed there, and happy. It’s carrying over, too. My back didn’t ache at all when I was there, nor did it ache yesterday and today. I’ve been smiling a lot since hanging out over there.
My friend Dave works as a reporter out in Los Angeles. He was covering the fires. He was pretty much right there. Check out this picture:
Isn’t that crazy? Of course, this guy’s been blown around in hurricanes, played in the no-gravity simulator in a plane, all sorts of stuff. He loves doing this kind of work.
The other night, I was giving Aidan a bath. He asked me to scratch his back. I did, and cracked up laughing as he went “OH YEAH OH YEAH” in this funny gruffy voice. That boy is hilarious. And his obsession with Tom and Jerry is the best thing ever. He LOVES the Zoot Suit episode. And we love to quote a part from a SpongeBob episode. The cartoon goes like this:
Sandy: I love karate!
SpongeBob: I love karaTAY!
Mr. Krabs: I love moneyAY!
Squidward: I hate all of you.
Yeah, Aidan and I quote that over and over and over. He’s so getting another SpongeBob DVD for Christmas, so I can watch it with him. 🙂 That cartoon is growing on me.
It’s finally starting to get really cold in my apartment. I’m in running pants, a sweatshirt, and fuzzy socks and I am totally shivering. It’s about 65º F in here now. The electric blanket will feel nice tonight. I’m trying to hold off as long as I can in regards to turning on the furnace.
How early do you guys (who this applies to) turn on your furnace?
Cheers!
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So… the new Britney Spears album leaked, apparently, because I’ve been able to listen to it. Non-stop. For the past few days. And it is SO GOOD. Seriously. I’m not joking. I remember years ago, being obsessed with the song Toxic. This time around, it’s Radar. And Break The Ice. And Ooh Ooh Baby. Piece Of Me is pretty good, too. The songs just bounce around in my head and I love it because they’re so great!
Anyway, even though she herself is having a rough time of it, her music is still fun.
Years ago, me and my BFF Charla used to have what was known as the three-song rule. If we liked three songs from any album, then the album was worth buying. That was back when singles were HUGE, but not cheap. At $3.49 a single, three of those came close to equaling the price of a new album. I always bought the singles anyway because they usually had some sort of remix or bonus song on them. When I can, I still hunt down singles and imports for that very purpose.
There have been a few times I’ve broken the three-song rule. It may have been based on artist loyalty. There are some albums I’ll get no matter what, just because of who sings them. Along those lines were New Kids on the Block, Paula Abdul, etc, back in the day. Now, with me being more and more frugal, I can’t go out and buy albums like I used to, but I tend to still stick to that rule. If I’m going to drop money on an album, I’d better like at least three of the songs.
Although, I heard one measure of Sarah McLachlan’s Afterglow album and had to have it right away. One measure. I knew from one measure of one song that I’d love that album. And I do love that album.
My musical taste is varied. I listen to such a variety of stuff that it’s impossible for me to choose any one favorite type of music. It’s also hard for me to pinpoint any favorite artist because I get fixated, then I change and get fixated on someone else. Like, right now, I am into this new Britney stuff, and I love Rent, both the Broadway and the movie soundtracks, and I keep digging out The Crüxshadows, especially Deception.
These are just a few of the songs that will always remind me of 2007:
Glamorous – Fergie
Breakin’ Dishes – Rihanna
Forca – Nelly (I realize it’s old but it’s relatively new to me)
all the Britney songs I listed above
Way I Are – Timbaland
I’ll make a list later.
I realized that I CANNOT listen to Rent while I’m trying to work. It’s way too distracting. Most of them time, I have no problem listening to music with words in it while I am working. I know some of the other editors say they read the words they’re listening to instead of the words on the page. I’d never had the problem before, until I tried to work on Language Support stuff and kept getting distracted and listening to the story of Rent instead of concentrating on the pages. So yes, if I’m doing the Language Support work, then no Rent. But if I’m doing Word Sort, which is mindless checking, then Rent all the way baby!
I recently got Miss Saigon out of the library and for some reason, I can listen to THAT while I am working on Language Support. Curious, that.
I finished reading a bunch of books this week. One of them is called Enchantress, and it’s part 3 of the Sisters of Isis series. I never cared much for fantasy, outside of Harry Potter, in the recent years, and it took some coaxing to get me to start reading Harry Potter. This year, I decided to broaden my horizons, and it started with the Leven Thumps books. So, I’ve been picking up fantasies here and there to see what I could see. The most memorable ones I’ve read this year was Wicked Lovely, my beloved Leven Thumps books, and of course, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.
So, the author of Enchantress is a best-selling author and she’s got tons of other series out. I find that I spend a lot of time getting so frustrated at the girls in these Sisters of Isis books. I am trying to have patience with the characters, but they’re so clumsy and awkward! I mean, I try to empathize. I suppose if I one day found out I was a Descendant and had to fight, oh, I don’t know, EVIL from destroying all of humankind, and that I had all these powers and my supposed “mentor” wasn’t helping me at all, I’d be a bit out of sorts, too. I GET THAT. But it seems like they kind of stumble into these huge messes of ancient evil and curses, and then they somehow pop themselves out. It’s hard for me to buy some of the scenes. In the first book they ended up basically in hell, but they were like “like, oh my God, like, is this hell?” and then they somehow managed to pop themselves out without too much trouble. Or they’re in Ancient Egypt–they’ve actually TIME TRAVELED because they have some stuff to take care of to SAVE HUMANITY, and the one girl is like “I hope we get back before the party ends.” HUH????? Are teenagers really that self-absorbed, that they’re in a battle for THEIR souls as well as you know, the WORLD’S, that they’re going to be like “I need to get back before the party ends”???? I mean, YOU’RE the one who went there in the first place to save the world… by your own choice….I dunno, I keep having hard time with the books. So now, by this time, I’m reading because I’m too vested in the book and it’s lunchtime and I’m alone and I don’t have anything else to read. Then, the author throws in this really sweet ancient Egyptology or an awesome battle scene and then I’m like “Okay, I HAVE to read the next one.” In Enchantress, she had this one meathead of a guy named Brian say something that I still can’t get out of my head. “Sweet damn.” I mean, is that a great use of the words “sweet” and “damn” or what? I loved it and laughed for ten minutes after. I still laugh when I think about it. I wish I’D thought of that. I mean, “Sweet damn.” I can totally hear a teenage guy doing it.
I might have to start saying it. 🙂
I am not sure if I’ll bother to pick up #4, though. We’ll see.
Got my car serviced today, finally. I got the long-needed transmission flush, an oil change, fluids topped off, and the air in my tires inflated. So now, I will feel better about driving longer distances. Lately, I’ve been keeping it under 20 miles. Mostly I just commute to work, which is an 11-mile commute each way. It’s been FANTASTIC for my fuel budget, let me tell you. I’ve been filling up every other week. When I lived in Pataskala, I had to get gas twice a week. The notes on the page say that there was metallic residue in the drip pan from the transmission. That makes me kind of nervous. Next month will be the radiator flush thing. Who knows the last time I got one of those. I also need to do is figure out now to fix my passenger side mirror, as it’s completely shattered and hanging off the mirror-holder thing. I’m thinking it’s going to be a while before I get that fixed, though. I don’t anticipate that being cheap AT ALL.
I’ve introduced Aidan to Tom & Jerry, and he thinks it’s the best thing ever. Target had Tom & Jerry DVDs for $5.50. I got him one last week and one this week, with a gift card that Rosa (meimeigui) had sent me. And… get this. My DVD player died yesterday. I had the thing for about oh, say, eight months or so. It won’t play DVDs anymore. It says “WRONG DISC” and won’t load. So, thanks to this gift card, I was able to get a new one. A BRAND NAME one, instead of a generic one. The one that broke is gfm or something like that. This new one is Philips. Not expensive but it already seems nicer. And I’ll bet THIS ONE will play High School Musical and The Proud Family movie.
Anyway, I know that people used to go on about Tom & Jerry, but OH MY GOD. They really are incredibly and almost horrifically violent. But it’s funny as I don’t know what, and Aidan laughs his little head off at it. Anytime Tom screams, and that’s a LOT, believe me, we both fall out in giggles. It’s great. Tomorrow, we’re gonna watch Tom & Jerry, he’s gonna wear his new pajamas, and we’re going to bake cookies!
I’m tired, but my body is bouncing. It’s like I’m restless and tired. My back’s been aching, and I know it’s been because I haven’t been sitting up straight. I slouch like eight bitches on a bitch boat when I am at work, and when I am on the computer. I need to stop that, and I also need a massage. A good, hard back rub. But that’s been relegated to the “luxury” pile and well, I don’t have time for luxuries at the moment, not those kind.
Tomorrow is Friday. Sweet damn. This past week went kind of quickly. I’ve got costume parties to attend, but Aidan’ll be wearing the costume. He’s Spiderman this year. I will post pictures.
My costume is in Chicago and reserved for other occasions.
On that note, I’m outtie. Byeee.
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