the trouble with being a night owl.

I’m a night owl. I’ve talked about this a billion times on this blog.

I love being a night owl. I love the middle of the night. It’s quiet. I feel no pressure to be on. I feel more creative and comfortable. Safe, maybe. I do my best writing in the middle of the night.

However.

I’ve begun working my day job again, in addition to another Berlitz contract, AND another short job coming later this week.

I’m also starting to move from brainstorming books to actually attempting to write them.

It’s tough reconciling this.

The freelance work is a little easier. They give me the work, a deadline, and leave me to it. I can do it when I feel like it, when I feel most alert, and when I can bust it out (as long as I focus!).

The day job? That’s a bit harder to manage. There are expectations of me being available from 9–5 (with an hour break for lunch), which means I need to be awake and alert. I also need to be awake because I’m copy editing things that get reviewed by lawyers and represent a huge company. Mistakes would be awful. It’s been unusually busy the last few weeks, so my brain is fried at the end of the day. I work from home, but that presents its own set of challenges. I have a sick kitty who wants attention all the time.1 I have to clean up after him every day. Sometimes I just hate being on high alert when I want to be napping.2 And I’m still technically recovering from surgery, so by the end of the day Wednesdays I am tapped out completely. My surgery site feels prickly, my back aches, and I’m exhausted mentally and physically. Friday, I signed off work at 5pm, ate dinner, read a bit, fell asleep at 630pm and woke up at 330am. Stayed up for 90 minutes before crashing again at 5am, and woke up for the day at 1030am. I broke my 27 day Duolingo streak (I’m learning Spanish! 32% fluent!) and didn’t even have the energy to mind too much. I was just that tired.

But sometimes, even when I’m struggling to keep my eyes open during the day, I wake up around 10pm. I want to write and watch Netflix and read and listen to music. This does not work when I have to be up in the morning!

I try to combat the fatigue by opening the curtains and letting the natural light shine on me while I work (and the cats sometimes enjoy a nice sunbeam bath as well). I drink V8 Energy, which is green tea, not coffee, and has a full serving of fruits and vegetables. I try to eat breakfast—yogurt and a Zone bar. Sometimes I’ll have tea. It could be the V8 kicking in and keeping me up, so I take melatonin at night. That knocks me out within 25 minutes, but the problem is that I rarely feel completely awake in the mornings. So, we begin again.

I would rather sleep in the day and stay up all night. (Except when I am at Disney World.)

Being a night owl is at odds with our society. Granted, there are more 24 hour options available, and there is the internet. But if I want to hold down a job, I have to be “normal” and well, it’s been decades and I’ve never truly adjusted to “normal.” So, the trouble with being a night owl is right now. It’s after 2am. I have to be up at 845am, work my 9–5 job and then do a few hours of freelance after. Plus eat and give Fi attention and take my vitamins and my meds. And try to squeeze in some writing. And connecting with my writer friends.

It’s a lovely, lush busy life, but it’s also exhausting. But what can I do?

Being a night owl is tricky. But I’ll manage it. Because honestly, my life is pretty cool right now. I really don’t want to trade it for a normal sleeping rhythm.

(Sorry for the random post. Just felt like chatting, I guess.)

Till next time!

  1. I don’t mind it too much. He curls up right next to me or lays behind me, and I kiss his head over and over. I love my little Fi so much.
  2. This is not to say I am ungrateful for the job. It’s a pretty sweet gig I have, and I am lucky to have it.

back to the grind.

After 90 days that included major surgery, recovery from that surgery, author visits, writing, lots of Netflix and DVD bingeing, travel, a writing workshop, visits to family, signing with an agent!!, losing my sweet Helena, and freelance work, tomorrow I head back to Humana. The DayJob™ is back.

I have mixed feelings! On the one hand, it’ll be nice to make money again, and after what happened the past couple of weeks in/on Amazon, Anderson’s Bookshop, Target, Whole Foods, Sephora, The Disney Store, Memebox, Planner Chick Designs—you get the idea—this is a good thing. I have a few credit cards to pay off, I want to start saving big time again, and also buy fun stuff.

I’ll once again have some structure to my day, which I’m both sad and happy about. It’s a good thing to have structure, right? But also, I’ll have structure, and accountability, and expectations, and sometimes that is scary. It shouldn’t be. I’ve been doing this a long time. I know I’m sad about losing the ability to keep my own hours. My body naturally wakes up between 1030am-12noon, and I tend to stay up until 3 or 4am. That’s just how I work best, and going to bed early tonight for a 745am alarm is going to feel weird. I have some melatonin to help with that!

I plan to continue working from home the majority of the time, which will help. Except my kitty cat has turned the living room into his giant litter box. We took him to the vet, and since he is so old, we opted not to do the biopsy. Instead, I’ve switched his food. I want to get him on all prescription food, but I need to get a MedCard since the vet is always out of the stuff. In the meantime, I have him on single ingredient food–the expensive stuff from Petsmart. Money is no object when it comes to my remaining kitties. I couldn’t stand a loss so soon after Helena. Maybe I’m overcompensating, but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

My brain is all over the place, apparently. Sorry, but not really. I will have to spend mornings cleaning up after Fi before I can begin working. I have puppy pads everywhere to help with the clean up. He’s old—nearly 18—so I can’t be too mad at him.

I’m finishing up the revisions for my agent (!!! This is still very thrilling to me !!!). I have a write-in this weekend at Rena’s place (YAY I get to see Rena!), so I plan to really buckle down and knock it all out. I told my agent I’d have my revisions to her by 4/17. So I have time… but this weekend I’ll be in a place to really focus. I’m excited!

But for now, I’m going to spend my last night of “freedom” eating fish and chips, watching the OC on DVD, and reading. I’m going to take a long bath, do a face mask, and get everything laid out tonight so I won’t be a mess in the morning. I’m so glad tomorrow is Friday, which means I have a weekend to look forward to right away!

Wish me luck!!

current & random.

I last did this survey in January 2005. Read on to learn more than you ever cared to know about me. 😀

(Funnily enough, some of the answers haven’t changed in 12 years, others are so so so different)

[ Current Clothes ] “I Stand With Standing Rock” tee-shirt
[ Current Mood ] tired and a bit overwhelmed
[ Current Music ] n/a – Watching The OC
[ Current Taste ] BBQ Fritos
[ Current Make-up ] none
[ Current Hair ] topknot
[ Current Annoyance ] nothing
[ Current Smell ] moisturizer
[ Current thing I Ought To be Doing] working, probably
[ Current Desktop Picture ] pretty, shiny, and pink
[ Current Favorite Band ] not a band, but I love Sia, Halsey, Tove Lo
[ Current Book You’re Reading] a bunch of different ones at the same time
[ Current CD In CD Player] CD player! Heehee! Told you this was old!
[ Current DVD In Player] The OC
[ Current Color Of Toenails ] rose gold
[ Current Refreshment ] Vitamin Water
[ Current Worry ] that I won’t nail my revisions, therefore letting my agent down

~~~~~~
BASICS
Name: Ronni
Sex: Female
Birthday: 12.20
Height: 5’1″
Hair Color: Golden
Eye Color: Hazel
Eye Color Of Choice: I like my eyes. Sometimes I wish they were greener, but hazel is pretty nonetheless.
Writing Hand: Right

BODY ILLS AND SKILLS
Nervous Habits: I do that leg shake thingy… and I play with my ear when I’m nervous and/or need to relax
Do You Bite Your Nails? When I’m very stressed or upset
Are You Double Jointed? No
Can You Roll Your Tongue? Yes
Can You Blow Spit Bubbles? Yes
Can You Cross Your Eyes? Yes

CLOTHES
On the average, how much money do you carry in your purse/wallet?: None of your business!
What jewelry do you wear 24/7?: Tiffany necklace, wedding ring
Favorite Piece of Clothing: Probably my grey hoodie

FOOD
Do you wind your spaghetti or cut it? Wind, for sure
Have you ever eaten Spam? Yup.
How often do you brush your teeth? Twice a day

HYGIENE
How often do you shower/bathe? Every other day, unless I’m going out
How long does your shower last?: Probably 10-15 minutes.
Hair drying method: Depends. Hair dryer if I want to straighten my hair, air dry if I want my curls to fly
Have you ever colored/highlighted your hair? Yes
What colors has your hair been? I highlighted it. It looked good but destroyed it. My hair took a long time to recover, so I’m never doing that again.
Do you paint your nails? I get my toes done sometimes

MANNERS
Do you swear?: Hell yes
Do you ever spit? Ew no, gross

FAVORITES
Actor: Theo James, Jordan Rodrigues
Actress: Shailene Woodley
Food: Spaghetti
Month: December
Day: Friday night
Cartoon: n/a
Shoe Brand: Sanuk, Doc Marten, Ugg
Subject in school: Dance/gymnastics
Color: Pink, purple
Person to talk to online: Rena
Sport: Gymnastics
Body part on/in you: Eyes
Body part on the opposite sex: Hair, eyes, lips
TV show: Jane the Virgin, Dance Academy
Movie: too many to name
Holiday: Christmas
Magazine: Teen Vogue
Vacationing Spot: Disney World
Thing To Do In The Summer: Enjoy the warm, eat ice cream, hang with Aidan
Thing To Do In The Winter: Write, buy and wear cute hats, scarves, and gloves. Celebrate Christmas, shop the clearance racks.
Perfume: Arboretum
TV Station: n/a

IN AND AROUND
The CD Player: n/a
Person you talk most on the phone with: n/a
Ever taken a cab? Yes
Do you regularly check yourself out in store windows and mirrors? Of course
What color is your bedroom? Light brown
Do you use an alarm clock? Nope, I use my phone or iPad
Name one thing you are obsessed with: Korean skincare
Window seat or aisle?: Aisle. My tiny bladder demands as such
What’s your sleeping position? All over
Even in hot weather do you use a blanket? I always sleep under a comforter and/or blanket.
Do you snore? Adam says I do. I don’t believe him
Do you sleepwalk? No
Do you talk in your sleep? No
Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? Yes :)
How about with the light on? I often fall asleep with the light on
Do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on? No

angel kitty.

Beautiful Helena

I lost my precious Helena Tuesday, March 14, 2017. I was out of town, so Adam found her. He said she was acting drunk the night before, and she was gone the next morning. The vet thinks it was as a stroke.

Helena came to live with us July 12, 2008. She was a special case. She’d come from a hoarder’s house, had dental issues, and obvious psychological issues. She’d been returned to PAWS, a no-kill shelter, numerous times.

But her first night, she and Crookshanks bumped noses and got along right away. She also trusted and loved Aidan from the first moment she set eyes on him. It took her a minute to warm up to me, and then to Adam.

Pretty Helena

Helena was a naughty kitty. There is no way around it. She peed everywhere, she bit people, she was always on the counter or stove. She would use the litter box only if we were watching. And sometimes she wouldn’t even go then. We’d considered taking her back, but we just could not. I simply refused to give up on her.

Once she realized we weren’t going to take her back, she relaxed and warmed up to us big time. When I came out of my bedroom, she’d run to to me and rear up on her hind lets so she could get pet. She howled when she was ready for her canned food, or simply a head rub. She followed me into the bathroom almost every time I had to go, and she’d lie on the floor and roll around meowing until I rubbed her belly. She loved cat treats and she loved eating.

She also loved us. She’d cuddle with me every chance she got. She wasn’t a lap kitty, but she loved to lie behind my head when I was working. She’d roll down my back when I leaned forward. Or, she sat next to me, purring like a purring thing that purrs. I got the long blinks from her, and she licked me a lot, which meant she thought I was part of her family. She trusted me, and that’s a big deal for a cat.

Beautiful Helena

She was also so beautiful. Female orange cats are very rare. So she was special in more than one way. I did love her, idiosyncrasies and all. And I miss her every day.

I hope where ever she is, there is a lot of canned food, cat treats, and pets for her.

RIP my second sweet angel kitty.

Now I have two.

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