Having friends who are depressed is hard. I get very frustrated when I try and try and try and they don’t see that I love them and care about them. Seems like my efforts go unnoticed and I feel like I can’t help them. I hate that helplessness.

I know, I have some nerve saying this stuff with MY history of depression, right? How many times have people told me and then SHOWED me how loved I am, and yet, I insist(ed) on believing that I had nothing or no one. It’s so easy for me to be frustrated now… and so sad that I can forget what it’s like to be in that pit of depression when nothing seems like it will ever get better.

HOW does one help, though? How can I make them see? Or maybe it’s not my job–it’s something they have to see for themselves. :(

On a lighter note, I’m totally skipping church today. It’s all Aimzy’s (hunan) fault. She kept me up til after 6am on AIM. ;) She’s so fun to talk to, I couldn’t help myself. I <3 Aimzy. I think I’m going to work on DOING NICE THINGS FOR PEOPLE today. I’m going to go shopping next week (when I get paid) so I can send surprises to people in the mail! YAY!!!! :D

It’s pretty outside, so I think I might sit on the porch and chill out for a bit. Or work on my scrapbooks. I REFUSE to sleep all day today. Absolutely refuse. This is my last full day of “freedom” before the booba gets back, and I intend to enjoy it fully. :) AND it’s going to be 78 degrees today!!!!!!!!! YEAH!!! Cute tops and flip flops, here I come! :)

Hmm, maybe I’ll go to a scrapbooking store and use their cropping space. I need to do something. We’ll see.

Whoa, I just went to Greenfield Online and checked my rewards balance, and I had $38! I requested a check today. Woohoo! :) And Chris owes me $50 because he threw out my Verizon phone box, and I needed it to get the UPC for a rebate. Well, he’s going to be paying me back for that, and hopefully learning not to throw things away that don’t belong to him.

I wonder how much money I’ve earned in other surveys? I should cash them all in and put it into savings. Or pay off credit cards! :D

Or by a Postal Service CD. I like them a lot. Thanks to Bizzy (otaku_witch) for introducing them to me. :)

Okay. Off to bathe and stuff. :)

‘Til later

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