Wow. Another birthday passed. Another year older. Miles away from where I was last year, this time. Always doubting, always wondering, always worrying. Floundering. But still moving. Still trying. Still hoping.
Birthday
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Month: December 2006
Mixed Feelings, But More Good Than Bad (Picture)
I’m thirty-two years old today. I don’t look it, I certainly don’t feel it, but there it is. I was born in 1974. The decade that teens now surely believe belong to the old people. I can say I’ve known people for 15-20 years. And yet, some memories of childhood still seem like yesterday. My life has taken a change that I certainly did not see coming a year ago. Make that several changes. And I’m growing into this new person, and learning to like her, maybe even love her. Appreciate her, nurture her, and take care of her.
I got to work this morning, and there were suprises on my desk. The admin was going around putting pretty silk boxes filled with candy on everyone’s desk, and giving those of us who were present a red rose. There were cards, and homemade fudge Rice-Krispie treats. There was an antsy and excited me, accepting happy birthday greetings from all over. In the midst of all that, I got everything done, and tomorrow, once I finish the two things in my inbox, I will be caught up through January 4, 2007. Unless I get some surprise rush stuff.
After work, all of us who worked on the LACE guides went to The Knotty Pine for drinks and snacks. Tamera bought the first round, but I only ordered a lemonade. I wish I could have stayed longer–everyone else was drinking and it would have been fun to hang out with them outside of work, and relaxing. Susan, the project manager, gave us all $20 gift cards to Barnes and Noble (YES!!), and Tamera gave us all Christmas CDs titled Naughty or Nice.
The past two days, I heard a beautiful version of Canon on the radio, with lyrics–a children’s choir singing Christmas lyrics. It was so pretty. I was sure I’d never hear it again, but it came on tonight. I decided to do some searching, and thanks to Google, I found it. Christmas Canon, by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra.
We pray
Our lives
Will show
This dream
He had
Each child
Still knows
The only bad thing I am worried about are my brakes. They’re grinding badly, so that means instead of relaxing tomorrow evening before the holiday rush, I’ll have to go and get them looked at tomorrow. I know something’s going to have to happen–more than likely new brake pads, but I really can’t afford the money or time to get it taken care of. However, I won’t have a choice–I need to be able to drive!! So I’m trying to figure out what I can move around and manipulate to make this happen. *sigh* I feel like I’m on a financial see-saw. 🙁 Tomorrow’s payday, but it’s not like I’ll see any of it!
Tonight, Bizzy came over, and we had spaghetti with hot dogs and watched The Boondock Saints. I’d wanted to see her brother’s band play at Little Brothers, but there was an $8 cover (although Jon said he’d get us in free), and I didn’t want to drive with my car acting so weird, and they weren’t going on until 10. Old folks like me shouldn’t be out that late. *innocent look*
Okay, so I was out late last night. Angelo and I went shopping. Okay, Angelo went shopping and I helped him pick out gifts. He got loads of neat things for his sister. He also bought me dinner at Applebee’s. We went to Best Buy, where he spent a nice chunk of change, so I gave him my Reward Zone card to use. More points for me! I used the gift card Andy gave me and got a CF card reader. Now it will be less hassle to get my pictures off of my camera. We also went to Toys R Us and spent way too much time in there. Playing with the Elmo that says your name. Looking at crayons and board games and dolls (the Hilary Duff doll may have scarred me for life) and learning toys and there I was, wishing I had all the money in the world so I could buy Aidan everything. But he’s going to have a very special Christmas anyway, thanks to my mom, and Andy, and Chris, and Ivy and everyone else who thinks he’s special enough to shower with gifts this holiday. Including me!! 😀
Tried out a new hairdo.
I think my face looks huge and blah, but the curls are cute. It’s not shorter, just very curly. I got a lot of compliments on my hair today.
Honestly, as far as looks go, winter is not my best season in my opinion. I think autumn is. And summer. But winter and spring…? Ugh. Just… ugh. And winter starts tomorrow officially, so yeah. Six months of me feeling UGH about myself, appearance-wise. Just…UGH. I’ve stopped wearing makeup months ago, but I wonder if I don’t look too pale or whatever? Wait. I’m not fishing for compliments or reassurance. This is my honest assessment about the way I look these days. I won’t go any more into depth than that.
So, digressing….
I took that picture at work, can you tell? That’s Janet in the background working at her computer.
Finished reading A Christmas Carol. 🙂 I’d never read the book before, and it was hard to put down. I loved it. But now I’m a bit sad because it’s over!! That’s the one bad thing about good books. Eventually, they do end. Good thing I’m a re-reader.
All right, I should get to bed. I’m starting to get reflective and melancholy, and there is no reason for that. And I have a longish day tomorrow. Sigh. The evenings go by too quickly anymore. 🙁 It’s not fair. But oh well. C’est la vie!
Til next time.
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I Feel Like Writing!
Yesterday was an AMAZING mail day. I got a letter from wlotus and a letter from verytruly, a load of cards, and two birthday presents!
Today’s line at the post office was INSANELY long. I mean, it was threatening to go out the door! Tell me that’s not a bit scary! Tomorrow is the last day to mail something Priority and get it there before Christmas. I’m sure the place will be a MADHOUSE. Eek.
Work is going okay. I was dreading working on the ELL pages for a while there, but now that I’ve helped develop the style guide, and now that Tamera lets me have the run of the project, I’m really enjoying it! I know I’ve mentioned how awesome Tamera is, but I must reiterate. She is AWESOME. Working with her is so much fun. She’s hilarious and just all around nice. Did I mention that she’s letting me make a lot of style decisions on this project? Wheee!
I’ve been looking at confirming pages for Handwriting–Practice Masters, which are books of excercises one can do to simply practice letter formations, joinings, and sentences. I like seeing the corrections I suggest get incorporated. I like making our products better. No, not better. The best.
There were loads of cards for me in my mailbox today. People come in every morning with holiday bags filled with gifts to give people. The VP gave everyone little houses filled with mini sausages and cheeses. One of the editors gave cards with handmade ornaments in them (mine will be going on my tree shortly!)
A Good Meme
I got this from a friend, and decided to reproduce it for me.
Step One
– Make a post (public, friendslocked, filtered…whatever you’re comfortable with) to your LJ. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related (“I’d love a Snape/Hermione icon that’s just for me”) to medium (“I wish for _____ on DVD”) to really big (“All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.”) The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.
– If you wish for real life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it’s your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you.
– Also, make sure you post some version of these guidelines in your LJ, or link to this post (it’ll be public) so that the holiday joy will spread.
Step Two
– Surf around your friendslist (or friendsfriends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their list. And now here’s the important part:
– If you see a wish you can grant, and it’s in your heart to do so, make someone’s wish come true. Sometimes someone’s trash is another’s treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don’t want or a gift certificate you won’t use–or even know where you could get someone’s dream purebred Basset Hound for free–do it.
You needn’t spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn’t to put people out, it’s to provide everyone a chance to be someone else’s holiday elf–to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not–it’s your call.
There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just…wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you’ll have the joy of knowing you made someone’s holiday special.
1. 
lilrongalATaol.com
Money. Until I find a part-time job to supplement my ZB income, I’m going to be cutting it close and barely scraping by, and if something comes up, like needing new brakes on my car (please, not yet), I will be utterly screwed. Any generously given help will be SO appreciated. Normally, it would hurt my pride to do this, but it’s the holidays, this is a wishlist, and I’d do the same for my friends if I could and they needed it. Besides, who doesn’t wish for money??????
2. A Mickey Mouse Clubhouse for Aidan. He really wants one, and he’s been such a great kid, but the thing is SO HARD TO FIND, and on eBay, it’s no cheaper than $75 with shipping. Unfortunately, I can’t get it for him. But he deserves it because he’s so wonderful, such a blessing, the light of my life. ♥ Uncle A was indeed, at it again! 🙂 Thank you!!!! ♥ Aidan will appreciate it so much. Today, he told Santa that he wanted a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. I can’t wait to see his little face!!
3. Gift cards to Barnes and Noble or Amazon.com or Best Buy 🙂
4. Grown-up size pajamas with feet. I lost mine. 🙁 I wear a small.
I’ll post the new picture when I get them!! 🙂
5. A laptop computer for Aidan.
6. Plane ticket for a four-day weekend to Chicago in May.
7. A book publishing contract. A best-selling career.
8. A toaster. I am spoiled. ROTTEN. 😀 But I appreciate it all. Thank you! 😀 I’m so excited about eating toast that I will forget to be afraid of it popping up. Yes, yes, yes. 😀
9. To be off of Lexapro. Peace of mind.
10. My friends to be happy.
I’m going shopping with Angelo tonight. Not buying anything myself, but he needs help, as always, with his purchases. We’re avoiding the Easton area. I think that’s the most wise decision. In the meantime, I’m gonna take a couple of Aleve (stave off the cramps), and hang up Christmas cards.
Til next time! 🙂
ETA: Let me reiterate that I have the BEST FRIENDS EVER!!!!
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Given The Choice Between the Two of You, I’d Take the Seasick Crocodile (Pictures)
Aidan and I had an awesome weekend together. When he leaves Sundays, I have mixed feelings. One says “now, I can rest!” and the other says “Oh, he’s so cute. I’ll miss him!” But I’ll see him tomorrow, so it’s okay.
I’d had every intention of taking a one-hour nap, getting up at 3:30pm, and walking down to the library. I didn’t get up until 5pm! 🙁 I hate that! So, I decided to wash my towering pile of dishes, make dinner, and wrap presents. I’m all done!
One of my nutcracker ornaments.
My holiday corner.
On Tuesday, Rob and I were playing with my 6-point filter, and decided to do something cool with my big ass sunglasses. Check out the flash in the lenses! 🙂 (Please ignore how NOT CUTE I look)
Weeks ago, I’d purchased steaks at Kroger Marketplace. Three little ones to a package, buy one package, get one free. Last week, I opened the package and made a little steak on Sunday night, one on Monday night, and I made the last one tonight. I had that, green beans, and rice made in the rice steamer. It was yummy! 🙂
And now starts the last week before the holidays officially begin. Copy editing galore for me. I did download some Christmas music that I used to listen to as I was growing up–a few Nat King Cole and Elvis Presley songs. There are a few cards that need to go out, and some to take to work tomorrow. I’d love to get some candy to stuff into Aidan’s stocking, but we’ll see how the budget looks for that.
Time to bake some muffins for next week’s breakfasts. 🙂
See ya!
P.S. Just like to mention that I hate loud neighbors. That is all.
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Interesting…
While watching Mickey’s Christmas Carol, adamselzer noticed that during the scene where the rats are digging Ebeniezer’s grave, one of the headstones in the background says “Gladys Knight.” Today, I paused the DVD and zoomed in, and noted that it went a step further and said “Gladys Knight & The Pips.”
I wonder if she knows about this?
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