Sunday Night

/ life, survey, weekend

Another weekend has passed. Went and got Aidan from my mom’s yesterday. He was being as silly and cute and sweet as ever. Getting back into mommy mode is always a challenge after these long breaks, though.

Yesterday, I finished reading Uglies by Scott Westerfeld, and now I’m reading Pretties. Specials is ready for me to pick up at the library, so I’m going to do that Tuesday. They’re very intense books, hard for me to blow through like I do with most YA novels. Interesting stuff, though.

Today, I watched The Covenant. It was predictable, but the guys were hot. Not a favorite, but it was enough to pass the time. I had a pretty lazy Sunday. Reading, resting, sitting in the glider while the electric heater blew directly on me, curled up in a blanket. It was restful. I didn’t get bored until the middle of Family Guy this evening.

I blew a fuse yesterday evening. Or tripped the circuit breaker. Whatever it is. I was typing away on the computer, enjoying the really warm air from the electric heater on my toes when PHOOOM. Half the apartment went dark. “Nice,” I muttered. Then I noticed night lights glowing in the other room. I knew then that I’d tripped a circuit. I fixed it and vowed to never put the electric heater on II again. This place can handle I, but not II.

We got a lot of snow, so driving tomorrow is something I am not looking forward to. Everything is prepared for work tonight, so tomorrow morning, I won’t have to rush, and I will probably need extra commute time. The freezing drizzle has me really nervous. That’s the dangerous, scary stuff. I hope the roads are okay by the time rush hour hits.

Lots going on in my mind. Just a lot of thinking I need to do. But scared to start muddling through it all. And paperwork. I’m so gosh darn sick of paperwork. Seems like there is always a problem and people want to point fingers instead of owning up and taking accountability and getting things resolved. I just know I’d like to RELAX fully and completely for once, but I can’t because there is always something to worry about, some issue to deal with.

And God do I need a massage. One of those ninety-minute ones from Gentle Wind by Heather Lane. I just need some Reiki, Swedish and deep tissue. Mmmm. I’m all tied up in knots and it hurts.

But anyway, before I go, here are a couple of surveys.

Sunday Night Surveys

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Personality Test

/ ronni

This is pretty much right on!


Your Five Factor Personality Profile


Extroversion:

  • You have medium extroversion.
  • You’re not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party.
  • Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences.
  • But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your “down time.”

Conscientiousness:

  • You have low conscientiousness.
  • Impulsive and off the wall, you don’t take life too seriously.
  • Unfortunately, you sometimes end up regretting your snap decisions.
  • Overall, you tend to lack focus, and it’s difficult for you to get important things done.

Agreeableness:

  • You have medium agreeableness.
  • You’re generally a friendly and trusting person.
  • But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism.
  • You get along well with others, as long as they play fair.

Neuroticism:

  • You have medium neuroticism.
  • You’re generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.
  • Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.
  • Your life is pretty smooth, but there’s a few emotional bumps you’d like to get rid of.


Openness to experience:

  • Your openness to new experiences is high.
  • In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas.
  • You’ll try almost anything interesting, and you’re constantly pushing your own limits.
  • A great connoisseur of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

(Originally published at Anywhere Is…)

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The Truth About My Writing

/ writing

The hardest block I’m trying to work through is the “you need to be working on more important things than this silly dream of yours” block. This block is more dangerous than writer’s block, in my opinion, because this block convinces me that my writing is a waste of time, that I’ll never make it, that this is a stupid daydream and that I need to give up on it and get a job at Applebee’s or something to make ends meet, instead of wasting time trying to write something that an editor will buy. Then something that people will buy.

At least with writer’s block, one has the desire and the will to write. The YNTBWONMITTTSDOY block is one that induces guilt, and shame, and makes me feel as though I don’t really have a right to do this, because there’s nothing really to strive for other than a bunch of useless manuscripts to shove under the proverbial bed, a lot of wasted time, and nothing really to show for it.

I am scared that all of my friends will realize their writing dreams, and I’ll be left in the dust. And I especially fear that this is something else I can add to the “just not good enough” pile. Once upon a time, I’d considered myself anything but ordinary. But now, I think I’m nothing but ordinary.

And as much as that thought disappoints me, it doesn’t surprise me. It’s how I’ve always thought of myself.

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Life Is Weird

/ life

Had the hearing this morning. The hearing that almost wasn’t! Due to misreading, then traffic, and then having to get searched! But it happened, it was painless and quick. It was my first time ever in a courtroom, and it was pretty. The magistrate was very nice.

I feel weird.

Exhausted. Not sure if it’s emotionally exhausted or physically exhausted. I got home around 10:15am, ate creamy chicken rice, and spinach (yes, at 10am!), read, and promptly crashed. Woke up about 2pm or so, played on the computer a bit, then headed out to do a few errands. Got restless and headed out again. I visited the library twice today–both times to pick up reserves. I have six new books to read! 🙂 Ate dinner, finished reading Messenger, then fell asleep again! Weird dreams, which tend to happen when one naps. Only awakened when the phone rang.

All in all, a very relaxing evening. And I don’t have to get up incredibly early tomorrow morning, so I can read some more. Yay. The problem is… WHAT to read? Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator is proving to be very silly, and I can’t get into it as much as I’d like to. Maybe I’ll try it another time. So hmmm. Maybe Iggie’s House. I’ll probably finish it tonight, too.

Later.

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