Early To Bed?

What is this? Not even 10:30pm (at the time of this sentence) and I’m bathed and ready for work tomorrow? What??

WEIRD. This is the first time in a long time I’ve been ready for bed this early. I wonder if I’ll actually be able to sleep.

So, since I had to keep going back to Express to get my sensors removed, I called them and expressed my concern. Guess what? They sent me a $25 gift card. AND I got another $5 in reward zone stuff from Best Buy!! Oooo, I need to go shopping. If the rain would stop, that is. I have $25 to Michaels, $20 to Kohls, $25 to JCPenney, and about $130 to Best Buy all just waiting to be spent!

Hmm. I do feel like I’m starting to get sleepy. So I’m going to try this. Good night!

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It’s Raining

Tonight at small group was okay. The most fun happened afterwards, though. Let’s just say it involved flying candy, french fries, and talk of how there is less fat in the waffle fries at Chick-Fil-A vs. the cole slaw from there. Crazy stuff.

Ate dinner at Cheeburger Cheeburger with Aidan. Aidan was quite the charmer in there. I spent the time waiting for our food teaching him letters. He can recognize a B, and E, an A, and an O. He can draw an O as well. Sometimes, he recognizes a D or an I too. πŸ™‚ When we were leaving, he was walking around saying “byee” to everyone in the cutest little voice! I saw the entire restaurant fall in love with him. It was awesome.

While there, I had a cheeseburger made with provolone cheese and A1. It was very yummy. My drink was a chocolate ice cream soda! πŸ™‚ I hadn’t had one of those in years. It was very good.

There is so much I need to do and I just don’t really give a crap:
– balance checkbook
– pay bills
– clean my room
– put away laundry
– clean family room
– refill medication

Shopping List:
– deordorant
– toy box
– granola bars

I feel tired, and I’m going to try to sleep before one for once in my life. So good night. Sorry nothing exciting happened today–that’s life sometimes.

Oh yeah, did I mention that I’m going to Disneyworld in May? And I want to go to Vegas in March, New York anytime to see Wicked, and Chicago to see Jen*Jen, and Florida to see Ivy? Man, I’d love to do all that traveling, but I don’t have the money or the time or the energy to do so. We’ll see, though.

Gosh, I’m fighting it. Normalcy, that is. I miss the holiday season. πŸ™

Night.

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seriously up insanely late
mind is racing at an incredible rate
stomach jumping and slightly sick
craving that ‘grape juice’ with a kick

body aches for more than some rest
tired of trying to be the best
sick of living for someone else
desperate, so desperate to find myself

at age 30, this is sad and old
should have an idea of what life’s to unfold
closing my eyes to see a dream never true
knowing and hating what i have to do

obliteration, numbness, blissful dark sea
fighting the wicked desires of me
wanting to run away from it all
but back to reality for duty calls

back to my life as i know it today
fumbling around trying to make my way
no idea if God even sees
this daughter of his, brought to her knees

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Called In

So, Aidan didn’t go to sleep until after 4am. Remind me to NEVER nap with him after 5pm again. Chris was sick, so he didn’t/couldn’t really help with him. I was supposed to be up for work in about 90 minutes, but I called in and told them that I wasn’t going to be in due to those two males in my family. There is no way I’d be much help to either of them at this point.

I’m going to try to reschedule my counseling too–I NEED to get in there this week and I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it tomorrow. I mean today. In 7 hours, bloody hell.

Where does the time go? I can’t believe I’m still awake. I wonder if I’ll ever get my sleeping pattern back on track. If it ever was on track.

*sigh* Goodnight?

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