I am gobsmacked that it’s already October. Absolutely gobsmacked. Agog as two gogs. Or maybe three.

Pretty soon the leaves will be changing. Peak is so pretty, until everything starts to fall off the trees.

Autumn is hard for me, just as much as it’s beautiful for me. It’s a gorgeous season. The perfect weather, the smells in the air. Sweaters and pumpkins and corn mazes and soups and chili. Campfires. Halloween. That brisk bite in the air. The crazy blue sky.

The breathtaking sunrises and sunsets:

The sunrise – September 30, 2005

The same sky, a few days earlier.

But then, there is the knowledge in the back of my mind of death. Decaying leaves after they’ve fallen off of the trees, bare trees, colder and colder days. Not looking forward to that part. At least there is my birthday, Christmas, Aidan’s birthday, and New Years to look forward to in December. The sucky part will be January-March. *sigh* Cold and snow and grey skies forever and ever. But at least in March I’m going to see Aimzy (verytruly) and Star (selfstyled) again. I have that to look forward to. DISNEYLAND again! ºOº

I am finding myself torn within my dichotomous self. One would think I was a Gemini rather than a Sagittarius based on how much I fight with myself. I want to be surrounded by people all the time. Laughing, talking, eating, having fun. But when they are around, I want to run and hide. Retreat to my computer where I am sort of safe. I’m scared again. Relationships for me, change with the seasons. A new season has dawned and already, things are changing. At least here with my computer, I have some sort of control in a world where I practically have none it sometimes seems.

I sit in my car full of ideas but then I find myself too tired to carry them out. I’m exhausted all day but at 9:30pm (except for tonight, of course!), I find myself wide awake, bursting with plans that want to come to fruition. Sort of like this rose, huh?

Okay, sorry, that was cheesy. But a clever way to show off the picture I took a couple of days ago, eh?

You know you like it.

Had a party last night. It ended up being a lot smaller than I expected but it was still good. There was a campfire which was a hit, and good food. Some people played Euchre. I got pretty buzzed, but not drunk. Although, the Memory Stick was out of the camera and in my computer this morning–I totally don’t remember doing that last night. I swear I wasn’t drunk, though…

It was good seeing everyone who came out.


1. I sleep with an eye mask on. Mickey Mouse, of course.

2. I often break out in to a British accent at random.

3. I sniff new binders as if they’re going out of style. I LOVE that new plastic smell.

4. Actually, I LOVE office supplies so keep me out of Staples, Office Max, and Office Depot if you know what’s good for you.

5. I like fruity cereal with kool-aid poured on it. Trix, Froot Loops, Fruity Pebbles. DON’T HATE UNTIL YOU’VE TRIED IT!

Yesterday, Kelle Belle (itskels) and I had lunch at The Olive Garden. She paid for me which was completely unexpected but very awesome of her. The food was good, too. I might be close to forgiving them for discontinuing their Strawberry Limon dessert.

I still have seven emails that need my attention. I’d whittled it down to five, but then I got two more. I’m not complaining. It could be like (swankivy), as illustrated in this post. Poor dear. So, two of mine are from her. I think I’ll spare her and not write back tonight either. ;) (She’d been up to 96, so she’s actually sort of making headway).

ACK. Somethings are just hard to accept. That’s all I’m going to say about that.

Before I go, here are some more :


It was COLD in Chad and Christy’s house. Kim, Theresa, and I decided to cuddle.


The beautiful autumn sky.

*Beavis and Butthead voice* FIRE FIRE FIRE!

A yellow rose from my yard. It smells yummy!

So, in brief (TOO LATE), highlights of the past week:

Sunday – Aidan broke a mirror over his head. Good times (NOT).
Monday – n/a
Tuesday – One Act cast party at Chad and Christy’s. LOTS of pizza.
Wednesday – Life Group party (yay we finished a book!)
Thursday – Lots of cleaning. Aidan “helped” clean the TV and flooded the thing with Fantastick. The TV wasn’t right for a full 24 hours!
Friday – Good but busy day at work. Party. Fun.

Work will not be fun next week. I’m getting pages (proofs) in now which will mean photocopying, and the SE/TWE tracker will be out for three days and I have to cover for her. Wednesday and Thursday will be good. Friday will SUCK. I’ll be glad when next week is over. It’s getting busy there for me. It’s okay though. Can’t wait to move up from tracker to proofer, though. THAT will be awesome.

Good night. I’m turning in early because I’m a nerd and like to stay up late during the week and sleep during the weekends. I MIGHT get up on time for church (HA). I’m going to wear a skirt, I think. :) It’s supposed to be a pretty day again. I want to drive separately (which Chris will hate). I just feel like being alone, you know? He doesn’t understand that. Like, how could I want to be alone at CHURCH of all places? He likes to sit with me, sometimes I don’t want to sit with anyone. He takes it personally and it’s not meant to be. I just want to sit by myself sometimes. Is that weird?

Anyway, I’m going for real now. ‘Til later…

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