ronni

Well, It’s Been A Week

A Day at Shedd Aquarium

It’s been a long time since I’ve updated. I’m sorry. I’ve been busy or unmotivated or a combination of both. And I’ve been sick. Since April 5. Coughing all night, not sleeping well because of the coughing. Sneezing, sniffling. Stuffy head. It’s the cold that keeps on hanging on. Or, I’d be ready to update and something completely messed up would happen and I’d feel like it wasn’t appropriate for me to blog about how everyone complimented me on my awesome yoga pants over the weekend when more serious things were happening in the world.

And I did wear a lot of cute yoga pants the weekend of April 12–14. I was working and attending workshops led by Ashley Turner, who is an urban priestess and amazing. And she has beautiful blue eyes and can lead a hell of an asana practice. My butt was sufficiently kicked. And something stirred in me…the thought of being a priestess is very appealing to me. But it would take a lot of work and time…and I’m just finishing yoga teacher training, so I am not sure if I’m ready to delve into another yearlong journey of self-discovery just yet.

We all know how last week went. I don’t even think I need to go over it, but I will anyway, because it was something else.

April 15. I paid my taxes, and let out a happy sigh of relief that that was over for another year, then heard about what happened at the Boston Marathon. And all of the stuff attached to it, culminating in the showdown of sorts on Friday, April 19. I was scared for Boston but couldn’t help but think of those people who live that way every single day.

Flooding. We’ve been having way too much rain in Chicago lately, and there was some bad flooding. Adam and I were lucky enough not be affected by the floods, sink holes, and geysers, but a lot of people weren’t so fortunate. And the rain just won’t let up, and now, at writing time (11:58pm), snow is forecasted as well. πŸ™

I don’t mean to make this about me, but I’m going to make it about me for a bit. My friends all over the country are posting their photos of them out in the sun, their blossoming trees, and wearing sundresses. Today? I was in a winter coat and boots. It’s been “spring” for over a month now but you really wouldn’t know it. It’s just as grey and bleak outside as ever… we did have the window open on Sunday to air the place out a bit. It was still cold (for me) but a lot of people took advantage of the low 60F temps to play outside and wear shorts and things. 60F for me is still coat, sweater, and jeans weather.

Explosion in Texas. Yeah. I can’t even imagine–going to work like any other day, and never coming home. It’s like… OK. In Chicago, on our highways, there are these signs they display the number of traffic deaths so far this year. I think, as of today, the number is 287. Those signs creep me the hell out. People going off to one journey or another and never coming home. Adam said that I shouldn’t get so freaked out about it because millions of people drive on our highways. But seeing those signs, with those numbers… I wish they wouldn’t do it. Because every time I’m driving on that freeway, I wonder if I’m going to add to that statistic.

There has been so much death and it gets me thinking all deep and dark when I’m up late and can’t sleep. Yesterday morning, Adam found out one of his classmates passed away. I didn’t know her very well, but we were friendly. We met up in San Francisco and had brunch back in 2007. She had such a kind heart. And now she’s gone and she was our peer and it’s just now really hitting me. I know that at some point in your life, your friends leave you, but I didn’t expect it to start happening while I’m in my 30s.

Katy and Me
RIP pretty girl. πŸ™

And then there is the beginning of life. On Friday, my cousin Mazayron had a baby girl. She’s beautiful and has a really cool name: Kimber. And my Facebook feed is clogged with photos of adorable babies in all stages of chubbiness and newness.

And I’m sitting here complaining about the effing weather.

Friday, I paid off my Disney World trip for June! Yea, my bank account is SUFFICIENTLY lighter now. Last week was an expensive week with that and with taxes. But it’ll be worth it. My mom is soooooo super excited and it’s adorable.

Also on Friday, I drove out to Naperville to meet Sarah Dessen again. You guys have no idea how much I adore this author and her books and how amazing she is with a crowd. I look up to her so much.

My favorite author @sdessen and me!!!! #sarahdessen #lilrongal

I first started reading her books either in 2004 or 2005. I used to start my day by her daily blog posts. I never thought I’d get to meet her, and now I’ve been blessed enough to meet her three times.

One of my favorite actors is in town filming a movie, and it’s kind of driving me mad that he’s so close yet so far away. I have no idea how to go about tracking down a movie star and frankly, I’m too lazy to do so anyway, so I just hope that I run into him and his co-stars when I’m walking down the street or something. I have until July to make this happen.

Not that I’ll have time for movie star stalking anyway. Because I was offered a job with Rainbow Educational Concepts and I accepted. I’d been freelancing for them on and off for a few years now, and they realized they needed help in their Chicago office. It’s a “term of project” job, for a year, we’ll decide where to go after that. It’s basically a yearlong temp job, which I’m perfectly fine with. It’s educational publishing–you guys know how much I love that. I’m just a bit weirded out about going into an office again, and working 9–5 and being up like normal people. I’m going to be drinking a lot of tea to get back acclimated to normal days again. It should be cool, though. Reverse commute, I can wear jeans in the office, and they’re pretty cool about all the time off I need in the next couple of months. I start May 1.

This Was My Saturday Afternoon #homework #yogateachertraining #yoga

Saturday, I turned in the rest of my work for yoga teacher training. A paper on Urdhva Dhanurasana (was supposed to be 3–5 pages, mine ended up being 9), my thesis, book reviews, study questions, and private lesson write ups. I attended a backbending thesis workshop at the end of May, and here I am doing a kick ass Urdhva Dhanurasana:

Back bending like a boss. :)

Now that all my yoga teacher training work is DONE, FINITE, COMPLETED, I can commence my Twilight movie marathon. Don’t hate. It’s some mindless fun to celebrate all the work I’ve done over the past year.

The last two Tuesdays, an actor from the show I love, Golden Boy, has been live tweeting with fans during the show. It’s so cool because she tries to interact with everyone who tweets to her. I’ve been having a lot of fun with that. She seems to be having fun, too. And yesterday, I was an extra in a video for a web series. It was probably the easiest video shoot I’ll ever be on in my life. I had fun!

Tomorrow and Thursday, I’ll be working at VSA, and Friday evening I have a dinner at Daren’s loft. Saturday is Girl Time For Girls, which means manis and pedis with my friend Missy, and Sunday evening, I have some stuff to do at Moksha. So… I plan to use Monday and Tuesday of next week to just… enjoy. Relax, maybe get a massage or something to psyche myself up for being a part of the 9-5 crowd again.

So, the past several days has been up and down for me. But, I keep trucking.

In the meantime, I need to get to bed. I’m already going to be hitting the coffee machine once I get there, but maybe just for cocoa. (Although I’ve been craving fancy coffee drinks lately–WTF has Starbucks done to me?)

Till next time….

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Monday

Flower

Every time I write an entry like I did last night, I get a bit apprehensive. I immediately want to take it back and apologize for being such a basket case. It’s taking everything in my power not to go and hide it right now. I can’t promise I won’t still do it.

I was just going through my photos on Flickr, and there is one from November 11, 2012, where I’m talking about how the weather feels like Spring. I remember that day. It was in the 70s and I got my last mani/pedi of the year. So, I’ll try not to complain about the cold lingering so much since the warmth obviously lingered for a while last fall. Not making any promises, mind you, but I’ll try.

I didn’t sleep very well last night. I went to bed about 1:30am, and I read until I fell asleep. But then I was up at 5:30am. The “non-working” medication I was complaining about last night finally kicked in apparently!

I do feel a lot better today.

Had an awesome phone call this morning with one of the freelance clients I’m working for. I really like this company and the work and the people I work with a lot. One of the reasons is that I get to use Track Changes in the things I’m editing, and guys…I really like using Track Changes. She asked if I’d be interested and available to take on more work as they go into their busy season. Um… YES and YES. I feel blessed when I get to do work I enjoy and get paid for it too.

So, it’s Monday, and here’s what’s on my plate this week:

01. projects for DSA πŸ™‚
02. Moksha newsletter
03. babysit tomorrow morning
04. clean Aidan’s room (this is mostly Adam’s job but I’ll do the fiddly-diddly things that he misses)
05. buy “filler” and gifts for Aidan’s Easter basket
06. put away laundry and clean my side of the room
07. teacher training homework
08. possible onsite project for VSA Thursday morning
09. get Aidan from airport Thursday night (this means dinner at Pop’s beforehand. yummy!)
10. make Aidan’s Easter basket
11. buy a few Aidan-specific groceries

It’s a quiet week, so I should be able to do all of this without any trouble. Adam just went off to Ikea to get a new mattress. πŸ™‚ That’s some good stuff. I’ve had the mattress we use now since 2006. I guess it’s time to replace it. We’re getting one with the individually wrapped springs so that when he tosses and turns, I don’t get thrown up to the ceiling.

Oh my God. Am I becoming boring? I just wrote a paragraph about mattresses. That means it’s time to sign off.

Till next time.


miscellany monday at lowercase letters

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Lately.

Now

warning: this entry is not all sunshine and bubbles…i did a backbends workshop yesterday and the results of that are coming up now. cue emotional mess!

Lately, I’ve been feeling….

{overwhelmed}

I’m working on a big freelance project, and even though it’s not very HARD nor particularly time-consuming, it is tricky. And also tedious. And also seems to be never ending. But hey, more money is always good so….

AND I like the company a lot.

I haven’t even STARTED on the April newsletter for Moksha. I need to get on that soon–I have a week to work on it and get it approved. I mean, I can and will DO it, but it would’ve been easier if I’d started on it sooner. Cropping pictures without Photoshop is going to be interesting. I have Gimp but Gimp and I FIGHT. So God help me. I guess I can always use “Preview”.

And I have GOT to get this teacher training non-contact stuff done:

1. thesis (2–3 pages)
2. write up for private lessons (finally had my last one Friday night) (3 short paragraphs, 1 page)
3. book reviews (2)
4. study guide questions (1)

It’s not even that hard. I’m just a self-sabatoger. I seriously could have had most of this stuff done months ago. I suck.

But not for long. I’m going to sit down and knock it all out this–probably Tuesday and/or Wednesday. Then I’m just going to submit everything in a big zip file. And then April 26, I’ll be done with teacher training. And I’m going to make sure I tell them I’m celebrating that at Disney World!

{satisfied}

The place was a terrible mess, but it’s much better now. I still need to put my laundry away, but the good news is that it’s clean. I also need to clean my room a bit. The snacks and books have taken over my side again.

We redid the living room. We got rid of the blue couch that Helena attacked (read: pissed on) with full force within the first week we had it, and replaced it with two chairs. We also got a new rug. The chairs are super comfortable, and so far, Helena hasn’t done anything to the chairs but sleep on them or get her toys from under them to play with. Crookshanks is sleeping on one in this picture, though. See him? Now can you spot Fi? hint: Fi is not on a chair!

LivingRoom2013

{worried}

Tax time is coming really fast. Enough said.
Also, I haven’t heard from one of my biggest clients on whether they’re going to use me this year. That is very nervous making. Without them, I will have to find another big client before summer ends.

{frustrated}

Because I’m a self-sabotager who self-sabotages. It sucks. I suck. πŸ™

{insecure & dumb}

I go through this a lot. Those moments when I am convinced that everything I say is stupid, wrong, pointless, and no one cares so I should just take a seat and shut the hell up. I can barely get a sentence out without getting interrupted, but GOD FORBID I interrupt anyone. I feel like I’m constantly pissing people off and making them mad at me. I think people just put up with me because they haven’t anything better to do, that no one really likes me at all. Well, I think Adam likes me, but I know I get on his nerves, too. Hell, *I* get on my nerves. Here’s a sample of the self-talk that goes through my head:

1. Shut up, just shut up. You’re so stupid and NO ONE CARES.
2. I bet none of them really like you. They only put up with you because they have to.
3. OH MY GOD you are so dumb. Seriously, shut the hell up.
4. Look at your fat stomach. You’re disgusting. (This one usually happens when I’m trying on clothes in a fitting room at a store. It gets worse than that if I’m in a particular Victoria’s Secret fitting room with the video monitors that show the models strutting their stuff down the runway. I cannot and will not shop in that store anymore because of that. Other reasons too, but mainly that.)
5. Wow. You’re not good at anything, are you? I mean, you’re OK at some stuff, but you’re not extraordinary at anything. Pathetic.

And then I want to lock myself in the house and hide under the covers and spare the world from my presence. Except Twitter and Tumblr and my blog, apparently.

{sore}

I didn’t even take all of Jason Crandell’s workshop sessions, but the two I did take (one on back bending, one on forward folding, twisting, and side bends) were quite enough. I did do some poses I’ve never done before, and some I never want to do again! I even did Eka Pada Rajakapotasana II and Dwi Pada Viparita Dandasana. I wasn’t even going to try Dwi Pada Viparita Dandasana, but I did it and it was awesome. Way easier than Urdhva Dhanurasana… but we did do that one about ten times before Dwi Pada Viparita Dandasana. Maybe ANYTHING seems easy after that. Anyway, I would love to soak in a steaming hot tub but the thought of driving out to King Spa tonight is not appealing. Because it’s freaking snowing and given the choice, I’d rather not drive in the snow. So I plan to go tomorrow night instead, after rush hour theoretically dies down. I’m sure I’ll still be sore enough to appreciate the spa pools.

{melancholy}

And it sucks when the medication that is supposed to be helping this doesn’t seem to be working.

{grateful}

I LOVE my babysitting gig. The little boy I get to watch is so super cute. I watched him for the first time last Tuesday afternoon. He slept for most of the time, but then he woke up and I went to get him. At first, he looked at me like WTF. But then I picked him up and held him and he just cuddled and cuddled and cuddled. I LIKE that. I miss the weight of a little one cuddling against me. I cuddle with Aidan, but Aidan’s all bones now. It hurts sometimes![1. Oh don’t get me wrong. I’ll still cuddle the hell out of some Aidan. As long as he’ll let me, at least!] One-year-old babies are soft and squishy. I can’t believe I get paid to cuddle a squishy little boy!

{excited}

Aidan is going to be here in a few days! I completely cleared my calendar so I can spend the entire Spring Break with him, despite the best efforts of the universe. I swear, every time I try to just… make space, a million people/clients/jobs suddenly need me for this or that. Most of the time, I go ahead and take it because well, money! But, this time, I’m setting some boundaries. It is always nice to make money, but I need to spend time with my boy.[2. I’ll work from home, of course. And if the babysitter calls, I’ll help her out. I can bring Aidan with me, which is AWESOME. Double the cuddles!!!!]

{tired}

I should head to bed soon. See if I can sleep away some of these blues.

Till next time….

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Nothing Says Procrastination Like Blogging!

Spring 2011 Blossoms

I picked a photo I took in the Spring of 2011 because I am SO READY for that now. It’s still cold outside, here. Cold and grey, and the wind kicks pretty hard. I know we didn’t even have a bad winter, but I’m still ready for it to be GONE. It’s March 14, for the love of sweet baby Jesus. Spring’ll be here in six days, not that you’ll ever be able to tell here. If the high DOES get above 40F, we’re also treated with a side dish of rain. But mainly, the temps have hovered in the mid-30s to mid-40s with no indication they’re moving from that any time soon. That photo from above was taken in May of 2011. I worry that I have at least two more months of cold to endure. WAH.

Most people like it cold because they say you can always add more layers. But there gets to be a point where a ton of layers makes me look like the marshmallow man and they’re bulky and uncomfortable. I have a high heat threshold and very little tolerance for cold–I actually get ANGRY when I get too cold. So given the choice? I’ll take the heat over the cold any day. The cold seriously feels like an assault on my body. I have to tense all up and shrink into myself, and it never works. Even when it’s in the 40s I have to wear layers and layers to stay warm, and it usually only lasts for a few minutes before I’m cold again. It sucks to always be freezing while everyone else says they’re fine or even hot.

At least the trees kinda LOOK like they may start to bud soon–the branches are starting to get bumpy. I wonder how much of that is my imagination, though. The lilac bush around the corner looks as dead as ever. I’ll know Spring is really here when I can smell those beautiful lilacs.

Lilacs

That’s what they look like when they’re blooming and smelling amazing. That photo was taken April 2012.

The sidewalks are covered in dog poo because people obviously can’t be bothered to clean up after their dogs. [1. Why even GET a dog if you’re not going to do everything you need to do to take care of it? I hate scooping the litter boxes but I do it because it’s better for all of our sakes.] It’s really gross. I mean, there’s always at least one pile of dog poo per block, but this is really out of hand. I almost took a photo today but thought better of it. You’re welcome.

Tuesday night was really good. Wonderful food, good company, and good times!

photo

Wednesday was good as well. Spent all afternoon and evening in Naperville. I was cold, but I managed to have a good time anyway. I had dinner at Noodles & Co. I love their Wisconsin mac & cheese, and I get the crusted parmesan chicken on it. I added a caesar salad for $1, and they have one of those cool now drink machines. I get the water and flavor it with cherry or grape. πŸ™‚ It was yummy!

My newest freelance project is underway and it’s not as hard as I anticipated. It’s kind of tedious, but it’s not the worst job I’ve ever done. I’ve been working 1/2 days at VSA, and that’s been going well. And things are going well with my new client, too.

Mercury Retrograde cannot be over soon enough. This is the worst one I’ve ever experienced. Last night, my friend Andy texted me and asked why I didn’t respond to his email. I checked my inbox and HIS EMAIL WASN’T THERE. This morning, I happened to peek into my junk email folder and found a bunch of emails from the past nine days that I have NEVER indicated should be junk and had never been marked as such before. Important email from Moksha, mail from friends. Meanwhile, every single Old Navy and Target email is steadily coming through. I was like WTF. Then I checked the spam folders–found out I’d missed a deadline on something because the email went to spam when it had no business. I am not sure what gmail’s problem is but they need to fix it! Fortunately, I was able to get the thing to the client in plenty of time, but that is seriously distressing. I spent my lunch hour setting up filters to keep this from happening again. I’ve never had to worry about this before. I like to use an email client on my computer–lately it’s been Outlook–because I don’t always want to log in to gmail. But because of this latest glitch, I think I’m going to have to go back to logging in on the web too so I can check those other folders. Because even though I have IMAP, the new labels aren’t showing up in my Outlook. FRUSTRATING. Maybe I’ll see what happens with Thunderbird again. I’ve been bouncing around email clients for a while ever since I switched computers and MacMail is being weird.

Today, I met with a family that I will start babysitting for soon. How exciting is that? I get to watch a 12 month old with the coolest name, and he is so sweet, with totally nibble-able cheeks and an adorable little grin. I’m looking forward to spending time with him. There is also a four year old I’ll get to watch as well. The cool thing is that they live walking distance from me, and Aidan is welcome to come along with me on jobs! I get my baby fix, Aidan gets to play with other kids, and the four year old gets an older boy to look up to. Win win all around. I’m actually really excited about this!

I *think* I might be able to sleep in a bit tomorrow. I made my deadlines, and I have a little bit of breathing room. VSA doesn’t need me until the afternoon, and then I’ll be busy in the evening with a workshop, and then coming home to do more work. Saturday, I am attending a thesis workshop, and Sunday I’ll be working. Monday as well, and Tuesday, and Wednesday! That work’ll be from home, though. Unless I go to a coffee shop which I doubt because frankly, no establishment ever keeps it warm enough for me. Which is why I work in my living room most often unless I have to be onsite. I FEEL more productive at a desk or a table, but my couch is more comfortable. And I have blankets and space heaters and kitty cats.

Adam got really sick the other night. He came out of the room shivering with his teeth chattering asking me to take his temperature. He was burning up. πŸ™ He’s been recovering, but he still has swollen glands and a sore throat. I’m feeling weird now… really hoping I’m not getting what he has/had. I really don’t have time to get sick right now.

Anyway, I am off to bed. Crookshanks just hit the litter box so that’s my cue. While I desperately long for Spring, I’ll look at more flowers.

Spring 2011 Blossoms

Till next time….

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