30 week blog challenge – week 10: a photo of you taken over ten years ago

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30 week blog challenge – week 9: pet peeves

This week’s blog challenge is pet peeves!


Now, I know that my default nature is to complain. Anyone following my twitter feed knows this. I actually feel guilty because I vent so much on twitter. I think it has to do with being from Cleveland. Most of the Clevelanders I grew up with are still very negative and pessimistic. So it’s in my blood, even though I do try not to be so negative and complainey. Because really, who wants to hear that, right? And there are a lot of amazing things to be happy about.

With that said, I do see the value in venting. Sometimes it’s good to get stuff out so it’s not eating you alive. But it’s all too easy to dwell in it, which is no good.

This blog entry gives me a chance to vent a bit, so here goes…

Rudeness. I cannot stand rude people, and I cannot stand myself when I catch myself being rude. This includes people who interrupt me when I’m talking, people who blast their music and yell and scream so all the world can hear them (like my neighbors who partied until 3am Saturday morning–when I had to be up at 8am for a workshop), people who let their children run wild in stores, people who let their large families take up entire aisles in stores and on sidewalks, people who see that you urgently need to get over on the expressway and they purposefully speed up so you can’t, people who don’t clean up after their dogs so there’s poo all over the sidewalks, people who yell and scream about their lives like everyone gives a shit…I could go on.

Footsteps. I realize this is my issue and no one is really at fault for my eccentrics, but I HATE the sound of footsteps. Poor Adam gets the brunt of it because he’s a pacer. He paces all the time. And I am usually OK with it…unless he puts on shoes. He wears really clicky shoes. And we have hardwood floors. He gets told off so much for pacing, slowly (even more torturous), while wearing his shoes in the house. Personally, I love the idea of not wearing shoes in the house. As someone pointed out, why would you want to bring all that outside crap and track it through your home? But really, it drives me crazy. Oh and when I’m in Target and someone is wearing high heels and it does that extra click? You know what I’m talking about. No, just… NO.

Chewing/Kissing/Other Assorted Non-verbal Mouth Noises. This includes cats cleaning themselves. Gum smacking (and the sad thing is that I’m guilty of smacking my own gum which makes me want to kick my own ass). But the worst is chewing noises. I cannot stand them. Sometimes I even hate the sound of my own chewing. It’s like nails on a chalkboard. It makes me irrationally angry and tense and all icky feeling. Even heavy enough breathing is enough to make me want to curl up in a corner and rock back and forth. It’s so dumb and I wish I wasn’t so sensitive to it.

There is actually a name for those last two items: Misophonia. Makes me feel better that I’m not alone in this, but it doesn’t mean I like it. There are loads of other sounds that trigger anger in me, but they don’t happen as often or make me react so much. And it’s happening to Aidan too. Whistling, humming, singing… those sounds make him so angry. He doesn’t even like attending concerts or listening to his mp3 player anymore.

Being Held Back. This can be due to many ways. People not wanting to spend money for certain things. Red lights. Traffic jams. Hours that take forever to go by. I like to do what I want to do when I want to do it, not have to wait for other people or things to happen or give me permission. I hate that I can’t just walk onto any movie or TV set and play a part. I hate that I have to be judged by others on whether or not I’m worthy to do certain things or another. One of the reasons I’m glad I’m a grown-up is that I can pretty much do what I want (within reason) without other people or things stopping me. So that’s why I think I get so irritated when someone or something DOES get in the way. Especially if *I’M* the someone getting in the way!

When I’m Lazy. I know. How can something I’m in control of be a pet peeve? But it is. For example, right now, the apartment is disgusting and I have no desire to get up and do something about it. Because I’d rather sit here writing and listening to music than clean. But I need to clean. And I will. But I’m annoyed at myself for not being motivated enough to do it right now even though the place is making me hide out in my bedroom because it’s so gross. Pathetic.

Bad Smells. My nose is super sensitive. I don’t know if it’s been like that my whole life or what. I just know that when I was pregnant with Aidan, eleven freaking years ago, my nose was like a sonic radar and I never got over it. So. Bad smells. They haunt me everywhere I go. Good smells are fleeting, bad smells are pungent and everlasting and constant. Neutral smells are OK but those are rarely not interrupted by a bad smell. I probably keep the incense/sage/air freshener/candle companies thriving because I am constantly combatting bad smells. It’s exhausting.

That’s all. I need to get back into a positive headspace. Adam’s taking me out to dinner and then to Half-Price books later!

Till next time….



Morton Arboretum 2013

Chicago had a crazy night of wind and rain, and I think that the high in the upper 40s today means that the part of autumn I’m not a fan of is settling in. The part when all the pretty leaves are falling off the trees with a vengeance and it’s just rain and cold and grey… until all that rain turns to snow. I think the Christians were on to something, tossing Christmas where they did. If I didn’t have the holiday season to look forward to, I don’t know what sort of shape I’d be in. I guess mourning for the true loss of summer, jeans shorts, sandals, and tank tops.

But. Moving on from that. I had a really neat October. There was my trip to New York City, which was amazing and awesome and will be blogged about for sure because a little blurb in a potluck post won’t be able to cover everything. But I’m not completely cruel, so here’s a photo of me laughing in Times Square.

New York City 2013

There was an afternoon spent at Morton Arboretum to capture the beautiful fall colors. I visited Graceland Cemetery, where I always get a little bit maudlin. I start freaking out about mortality and letting my mind go to dark places. Maybe I shouldn’t visit cemeteries anymore. But then, how could I get photos like this?

Graceland Cemetary

There was my trip to Columbus, Ohio, where I hadn’t been for three years. Things just fell into place for me to attend the Ohio Valley Filk Fest this year. I’m not even *that* into filk, but a lot of people I adored was going to be there. Someone offered me a ride. And I made hotel arrangements with Belinda and Patrick. And with all that working in my favor, plus a chance to see Aidan? It was a no brainer. Aidan had no idea, so when his dad pulled up to the hotel, Aidan was not impressed. Then he saw me and his little face lit up like the sun. It was so awesome to see! I’d missed that little guy and scheduling this year has made it hard to see him. Last weekend was the first time I’d seen him since he left in August.

Surprise Weekend with Aidan
i was so happy to hug him again!

It was so nice to spend the weekend with him, and with some other friends in the sci-fi/con community.

Belinda, S00j, and Me
belinda, s00j, and me
so blessed to know those two beautiful women
and of course i had to represent my alma mater

I got to eat at my beloved Bob Evans with my friend Angelo, who I’ve known since college and who I adore. Even though I really enjoy the Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwiches, there is no sausage better than the Bob Evans patties.

Now that November is here, all of my shop emails are turning to holiday themes. Which I’m usually OK with but this year, I feel like it’s rushing me a bit. Probably because the place isn’t holiday ready, what with Lena’s litter box habits being very out of whack and the constant cleanup because of that. Also because we need to just do a serious deep cleaning anyway and I have zero motivation to do it any time soon. There’s cat hair everywhere. The kitchen counters need a good scrub down. I need to sanitize the bathroom again. And I will. Truly. A lovely pixie named s00j is coming to spend the night in a couple of weeks and I want to make sure that the place is spic and span for her.

Crookshanks has plopped on to my lap and is purring like a purring thing. He’s also putting his paw on my hands every time I start typing, so I think that means it’s time to sign off for now. Tonight’s plan is to kick off my weekend Singing Myself Awake. Third year in a row I get to study with Suzanne Sterling. I’m a bit nervous about the asana practices. She kicked my butt last year and that was when I had a regular and strong practice. Now my practice is weak and sporadic. I’m going to be hurting by the time this weekend is over. But it’s my fault for letting my practice slip so much. I’m also worried because I have health issues this year that weren’t as severe last year. This year they could be a hindrance, but I know that I can always modify. Maybe this weekend will kick me back into gear.

Anyway, I’m off for now. Need to shower and eat something to prepare for the asana kicking I will surely experience tonight. And Crookshanks really does mean business.

Till next time….

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30 week blog challenge – week 8: cravings

Mickey Cookies

I tend to get strong cravings. People who follow my Twitter feed may see some of my random cravings pop up from time to time often.

I have to start by saying I have weird food rules regarding myself. That’s something I won’t go into detail here, but it’s part of the reason I deny myself the cravings I get so often. I crave random things at any time, but my most frequent cravings are sushi, bacon or sausage and Cream of Wheat, Crispy Crowns (a version of Tater Tots) Cocoa Puffs Treats, any kind of sweet drink that’s non-alcoholic, and when I get in the mood, spaghetti, spaghetti, spaghetti.

Recently, it’s been sub sandwiches or sushi, or those sausage, egg, and cheese croissant sandwiches that Jimmy Dean makes. And I know I’m a sugar addict. I love sweets so much. Chocolate, macarons, cupcakes, cookies, candy, jelly donuts, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate. I love sweet drinks. Juices. Kool-Aid (or its various knockoffs), fruit punch, lemonade. Yes, I definitely have a sweet tooth. So I crave a lot of sweet things and quite often. But don’t think I ignore the savory. Cream of chicken rice soup is a song for my soul and I love to indulge when I made it to the diner. One of my favorite meals is spinach over chicken rice. Mmmm.

So there you have it. Cravings. Amen.

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loving these days.

October Rainbow

“…positivity is not about being soft, it’s about being smart. you suckers.”–donnie wahlberg

This quote:

If not me, who?
If not now, when?

Seriously, though. Why do I procrastinate so much? I need to keep this quote in the forefront of my mind. Carpe Diem. Seize the day. Make it count. And all that stuff. I also need to actually FOLLOW it. You should see the things that go through my mind at night. Then the daylight comes and I’m like ZzzZzzZZZzzZZ.

But this week will be the week to change things. They’re doing construction in the neighborhood again, which means pounding and banging for eight hours, starting at 8 or 9am. Which I think should be against the law. Hammers should NEVER be allowed out before 10am. But that’ll keep me from sleeping all day and being up all night… MAYBE. :)

These sweaters from Old Navy:

Screen Shot 2013-09-13 at 10.39.55 PM Screen Shot 2013-10-07 at 11.52.54 PM

They’re so cute and soft and fun to wear! I love them both with skinny jeans, boots, and a denim jacket.

This perfume from Gap:

gapstay It smells really light and fresh, like I stepped right out of the shower. I also like their perfume called “Close.” I’m very sensitive to scent, and some perfumes are just too much. Like, I know it’s supposed to be the rich person’s scent and all, but I cannot do perfumes like Chanel No. 5 or anything that smells close to that. And most of the celebrity-endorsed scents just do not work well with my nose. I’m also not a huge fan of the staple scents like CKOne or things like that. Give me light, floral or musky, and clean and fresh.

My tan “Queen” boots from


They sometimes have three colors: black, dark brown, and the aforementioned tan. (Right now, they only have the black ones in stock.) I happen to own all three colors because I love this style of boot so much. But when I got the tan ones, I really wondered when the hell I’d wear them because I wasn’t used to such light colored boots. But they’ve been a godsend this autumn, going with everything and looking great! I’ll wear the black ones and the dark brown ones later in the season and in the winter, but the tan ones are awesome for the fall.

The other colors:

black brown

My Bongo messenger bag:

Screen Shot 2013-10-08 at 12.24.24 AM

I got it 50% off, and yes, it’s faux leather but I don’t care it’s sooo cute and autumny and roomy. I can fit my wallet, camera, phone, a notebook, my iPad, and a bottle of water in the thing. I love that.

Other things I love…..

The massive amount of books I’ve been buying lately. I bought a bunch of books when we were in Ohio and had stopped in a Barnes & Noble. Most of them were for my mom, but I got some for myself as well. (I also broke down and bought the dang membership because I spend enough there anyway, and with all the discounts I got that day, the membership ended up costing me $5.)Last week, we went to Half-Price Books where I went crazy in the clearance section for both books and CDs. I left with two bags bursting with stuff for under $30, including some Gossip Girl novels, which are SUCH a guilty pleasure. I don’t know about you all, but I feel so much for the Blair in the books. I think she is my favorite. Monday, Adam and I went to Anderson’s Bookshop (best bookstore EVER) and I got two new books. So I have a load of books to read and they’re all stacked by my bed waiting for me to happily devour them.

How cute Adam looks in the fall. :) Now that the weather is cooling down, he’s stopped being quite as cranky. He loves the fall and all the pumpkin stuff, and the fall colors look really good on him.

What are YOU loving these days?

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